


Copper Miracles

by Bloodwolf



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe- Steampunk, Developing Relationship, Fluff, Healing, Human!Tav, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other pairings/characters as it goes, So so much fluff, Steambot!Gamzee
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-09-22
Updated: 2014-01-24
Packaged: 2017-11-14 19:00:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 30,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/518493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bloodwolf/pseuds/Bloodwolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A long time ago, the copper clown used to believe in miracles. That belief died alongside his creator.</p><p>Until someone gives him the chance to believe again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yo. Cross-posting this from... everywhere else.  
> A little warning though, this chapter might be a bit... Icky.  
> Never got my current editor to pretty it up.

Along time ago, he used to believe in miracles. But, of course, that was when he used to walk beside his creator.

The memory of when he first woke up still lingers in his think pan and would bring a smile, albeit empty and broken, to his face. When his indigo glowing eyes first met kind, gray eyes, he was happy. He at first explored the new surroundings with bright eyes of that of a child, touching and observing every little detail of his creators workshop. He even found face paint in the basement and dawn the visage of a clown. When children came to the shop to spy on the old man working, the clown steambot would entertain them with magic and wonders _(AnD mIrAcLeS)_ his creator taught him. They we’re scared at first, a bot with clown makeup would put anyone off at first glance, but the bot kept performing his wonders and magic _(AnD mIrAcLeS)_ , and the kids came to love him.

Later, with a smile on the engineer’s face, he was given the name Gamzee. And the bot couldn’t be happier.

Almost a year after he first walked, the bot finally got the opportunity to go out with his creator in the city of Skaia. 

As much as he wanted to go and explore this beautiful city, Gamzee was instructed to stay near the square’s fountain, while the old man went to run a few errands. The automaton stayed put, and started to juggle a few indigo balls, really just waiting for his creator to return. Out of no where, a few kids he recognized from the shop, few new children he didn’t know, they started to egg him on, shouting at Gamzee to juggle more balls. The clown bot merely cracked a grin. Who was he to deny them his wonders _(AnD mIrAcLeS)_?

But the time the engineer was finished with his rounds, he found Gamzee stationed in frount of the fountain, a crowd of children and adults alike surrounding him, tossing nearly dozen indigo orbs in his quick copper hands, while said crowd kept cheering. When the old man hesitantly pulled Gamzee away, the crowed booed in disappointment. Gamzee, never one to bring frowns to a crowd of good kids, twirled clapped his hands and releasing three doves with indigo ribbons tied around their necks above the crowd in Skaia’s black and white square. The children cheered and Gamzee left with his creator with a smile on his painted face.

This was the reason for his creation. To entertain, to perform, to wow the crowd with magic _(AnD mIrAcLeS)_. 

As the years went by, the automaton fell into this comfortable routine. He would mostly stay in the shop, practicing his magic and wonders _(AnD mIrAcLeS)_ by himself, enjoying the sounds of the workshop as his creator worked, or go out in the town, performing his magic _(AnD mIrAcLeS)_ to the masses of Skaia. Gamzee wouldn’t have it any other way.

That is, until he found the engineer at the base of the stairs void all life. Gamzee tried with all his might to wake him up, shaking him, pounding his chest, but it was no use. He tried and he tried but his creator could not revive. The clown bot started hammering harder and harder, even when he heard the sickening cracks of the old mans ribs breaking. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity to the bot, he stopped. With a sad crack of his voice box, Gamzee left the man on the floor. 

The engineer was found a week later by a worried apprentice. Gamzee was in the main room, juggling slowly, sluggishly. The bot felt something grow dim in his chest when the old man’s body was carried off. 

Gamzee doesn’t remember much after that. He pushed the memories to the furthest archives of his think pan. However, he does remembers a stone rock on the ground. The bot would stay there, days on end, not doing anything but juggle and perform tricks to the stone. Apprentices would come by once in a while to check on the lonely steambot, but none tried to pry him from the spot. Eventually, he did go back to the empty shop on his own, and the monochrome streets of Skaia. Eventually he did go back to performing on the streets. 

But it just wasn’t the same. Not without his creator standing next to him, cheering along with the crowd. Years went by, and Gamzee never felt more alone, despite the cheers emitting from his audience.

Now, nearly 60 years later, he was still alone, still performing on the streets or hide out in the long abandoned workshop. He barely spoke to anyone, merely offering empty smiles and small waves. He was given the nickname “Gamzee, the Miracle Bot”, a name that stings his chest and think pan every time someone utters it. 

For now he just ignores the pained feelings in his copper chest and kept performing his ‘miracles’ to the crowd.

Believing in them was a different story.

~*~*~

Sitting in a copper wheelchair on a steam train heading to the capital city of Skaia, a boy named Tavros Nitram fidgets nervously in his seat at the thought of moving from his childhood city to the big capital.

A long time ago, Tavros had hopes and dreams like every other little boy. He would go out and play with the other kids in the golden city of Prospit. He wanted to be a hero, like the ones in his fairy tales or bed time stories his father told him. He was energetic, full of life, and had the world opened to him every time he walked outside his house.

That all came crashing down, though, on a very cloudy day when he was eight years old. He was outside playing with all the other kids like any other normal day. The clouds heavily covered the sky, suggesting rain later in the day, so the kids wanted to play as much as they could outside before it hits.

Tavros was just arriving at the park, is father behind him already chatting with the other parents. As the tan boy was just about to join his friend, Jake English, in another one of his adventures, the park bully, Vriska Serket, grabbed him by the arm and ‘asked’ him to play. Tavros didn’t like playing with her, she was always rough and last time she broke his arm, but Vriska was older, bigger and ultimately, gave him no choice.

The girl lead him away from the park, past the gates, out of the prying eyes of the other children and adults. After a few minutes of struggling and complaining on Tavros’ side, she lead him to a cliff overlooking the ocean. The young boy cringed. Vriska dared him to get close to the edge without running away. Tavros flat out refused, and before turning back to the park, the girl started to taunt him. Harsh words flew from her mouth as she degraded his dreams, his friends, his heroes. With an angry face, the boy started to walk to the edge, cautiously. Finally after what seemed like an eternity of slow, careful steps, he reached the edge. He visibly shivered as he braved a glance down at the ocean. 

Just as he was about to turn around and gloat at the bully, he felt a pair of hands throw a forceful push.

It was a blur after that, all Tavros could remember was pure fear and the words “Fly, Pupa!” shouted from behind him. All his brain could process was intense pain and a sickening crack before everything became black.

When he woke up, he found himself in a hospital room surrounded by under maintained medic bots going about their business, and his father slumped over the side of his bed, asleep. The first thing the child registered was the absent feeling of his legs. When he tried to pulls over the sheets to investigate, the doctor came in.

The doctor barely even glanced at Tavros before telling him that he broke his spine at the base, and that he may never walk again. It took a few minutes for the boy to realize the how severe the news really was, and drowned any other new the doctor told him with a heavy cry.

It took a seven weeks for the boy to accept his state and the wheelchair. Seven long, horrible, emotional weeks. Labor steambots would come and go, building ramps and making his house easier for him to move around in, while he sat in his room, watching in envy the other kids playing in the park. Tavros could no longer run, jump, and play with the other kids, and his dreams we’re crushed like a flower under an oversized brutes foot. When he would go outside, other kids would throw harsh words at him, and, at rare times, pity.

So he stayed in his room, shielded himself from the outside world, immersed in his fantasies and fairy tales. He became sheltered, only emerging from his room when he needed to go to school or run errands when his dad couldn’t (which to say isn’t much). His old friends would come by once in a while to check on him, and maybe play a few of his games with him, but Tavros would send them away, not wanting them to be burdened by his disabilities or worse- pity Tavros.

He hated it. 

This cycle when on for years. Years of the same boring routine, added with self-hatred, until a few days ago when his father announced his new position with Skaia’s Elite Calvary Steam Riders and that they will be move to the capital. Tavros knew that his dad wanted this opportunity since he was a kid, and was extremely proud of him. (At least he can achieve his dreams.) 

The train ride was bumpy, but the copper locks holding his wheels down absorbed some of the recoil. Tavros couldn’t help but spend his ride looking out the window, at the rolling hills and grassy plains of the countryside and sometimes a small village, here and there. Despite the peaceful atmosphere, he couldn’t stop himself from flinching every time the capital was mentioned, or even when the train roars. His father would catch wind a couple of times and place a comforting hand on Tavros’ shoulder. The young man would simply give his dad a reassuring smile, before taking his eyes back to the window. 

Finally, the boy saw the famous black and white fields of the capital, Skaia. Now he shivered. Taking a deep breath, he pried his eyes from the window as he heard the automaton over the speakers talking the passengers through the departure.

~*~*~

Only a few hours in his new home and already Tavros felt a bit queasy. He never liked the aspect of change. His last big one landed him in a wheelchair.

Maneuvering around the labor and maintenance bots, he made his way to the kitchen, hopefully to grab a snack. He probably won’t get anything, seeing as they didn’t go to the market in the few hours they lived here. 

Reaching in the cabinets, his search turned vain as none of them we’re stocked. He expected it, but still. Nervous habit, he supposed. Throwing a bored sigh, he moved a out of the kitchen, careful of the labor bot stationed, and explored the house even more. 

It wasn’t extravagant- it was as standard as any other place should be. As far as government housing goes. His dad was given the place when he got transferred, and it was ready to move in, so he should count his blessings. They would have never gotten a place here otherwise.

Running a hand through his Mohawk, he let out another exasperated sigh. Wheeling to the hallway, he figured he could get some shopping done while his father’s out. Leaving a simple order to one of the bots to inform his father of his departure, he took a deep breath and wheeled himself out the front door.

New city, new start, right? The wheelchair boy hoped.

The city was far grander than he could have ever imagined. People come and go, bots are always working on something, kids playing in the square (Tavros had to turn his head away in envy at that), market stalls calling out to the passerby. It was a lot bigger than Prospit could ever be. And that terrified him more than it should.

After a few minutes of taming his nerves, he approached one of the many fruit stands and purchased a few apples and pears for now. He and dad will have to shop more later, this was more for looking around anyway. 

With a stuttered ‘thank you’, the mohawked boy wheeled himself back to the house when something caught his eye. A crowed formed in front of the fountain on his way bac to the house. With a spark of curiosity he decided to approach the cheering crowd. When he wheeled himself to the front (or how far front the could get) he saw te distraction.

A steambot, from what he could tell, was juggling indigo orbs in his hands. And Holy Rufio, they’re on fire. 

Wheeling back an inch, he observed as the clown painted bot, attired in a simple black shirt and polka-dotted pants, moves his bronze arms fluidly to catch and throws the orbs. This was odd for the boy, normally steam bots moved blocky, due to the lack of joints, but this one moved smoothly, precisely, like it was a human in a copper suit.

At first he was a bit put off by the bot, the face paint wasn’t exactly well kept and it’s black hair was stuck in multiple directions, matted with grease and oil, and a bit of something green he couldn’t identify. But in due time, like the kids, he found himself cheering on the lone clown automaton. 

The bot continued it’s ministrations as the orbs kept aflame in the air. Soon, the indigo burned away, and as the orbs landed on his hands, no longer in flames, landed in the colors of black and white, the colors of Skaia. Tavros clapped harder and the kids begged for one more trick.

The bot complied and clapped his hands together, orbs still in hand, and when he pulled apart, doves, tied with little indigo ribbons, flew free. Tavros watch as birds flew off in different directions round the square. He smiled and clapped as the kids in front of him roared in approval. Soon, the kids gather with their parents and left the square, leaving the bot to him self. 

Tavros lingered a bit, looking at the bot and before he decided to head back, the bot turned an caught the young wheelchair bound boy. Glowing indigo surrounded with gold met plain brown as the clown gave the boy a smile and a small wave. Tavros turned his head and laughed to himself, blushing slightly. When he turned back, the bot was gone. With a tentative frown he wheeled back to the house.

When he got back nearly a half-hour later, he spotted one of the very doves the automaton released, still tied with an indigo ribbon, perched on his roof, cooing without a care in the world. Tavros smiled to himself. 

Maybe this city won’t be so bad.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bot and the boy's first meeting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edited here on out by a good friend over on Gaiaonline.  
> Oh, Tav's dad is the Summoner, and headcanon decrees him as the troll Barney Stenson.

A few weeks into Skaia and Tavros already found himself in a comfortable routine. Well, as comfortable as he can be considering that he's an anti-social paraplegic in a new city with no friends. But he wanted a new start, despite acting like a malfunctioned labor bot in the middle of a heavy work zone. 

 

At first, it was nice. No one bothered him, or even so much as gave him a second glance. He was thoroughly ignored, and Tavros preferred it- it was much different than the harsh treatment he got back in Prospit. Little by little though, that small bit of contentment turned to loneliness as they just kept disregarding him. The wheel-chaired boy barely had any interactions with people besides his father, a few teachers, and the occasional grocer and labor steambots. 

 

Although whenever his mood does go sour and the days were particularly rough, he always had that little clown bot at the fountain square. The bot would only show himself once every few days, but it was enough for the mohawked boy to get through the week. 

 

Especially on times such as right now. 

 

His dad was fussing at Tavros' Mohawk, trying to at least slick it back. The boy simply shook his head, shaking off his dad's hand and returning his hair back to it's original, messy form. Tavros doesn't like constant nit-picking he often receives from his father. Especially in public. His dad sighed and ran a hand through his own streaked hair and after a few moments of struggling, he eventually gave up. The boy knows that his dad know what's best, but his 'best' usually ended up being abandoned at the side while his father hits on some random female. 

 

Tavros shuddered in his chair. His dad's endeavors were never subtle. Even when they were supposed to do something important. Like going to the doctor. Which is what Tavros was supposed to be doing if it wasn't for his father checking out every single passerby. The boy gave an exasperated sigh, wheeling himself further while his dad trailed aside him, making small talk with his son (when his eyes aren't peeled to the backside of some female). 

 

After his dad went silent for the millionth time, he turned around to see him already sweet talking some pretty young thing. Tavros gritted his teeth, regretting not taking the bus, or any other form of transportation. The boy would try to go over there to remind his dad that they had errands, but in the end, it would only cause frustration, so with a shake of his head, he rolled forward past the square. 

 

As he passed the familiar fountain that centered the square, he spared a glance at the calming sight. He noticed that the crowd already formed at the base. Digging into his vest pocket, he pulled out a small golden pocket watch, and checked the time. After a quick mental argument, he decided to spare a few minutes, and rolled his way to the forming mass. 

 

As he approached the front, he was greeted with the sight of the familiar bronze clown setting up. Grinning slightly to himself, Tavros set the brakes on his wheels and situated himself. He watched as the clown bot started his normal routine. 

 

As time went by, he noticed a pattern to the bot's shows. First, it was a few optical illusions, then a couple of disappearing acts, then the juggling (sometimes the orbs would be on fire- Tavros always wondered how his hands never melt), then the beautiful doves. He always ended with the doves. And honestly, they were Tavros' favorite part. 

 

After all, Prospit never had anything like this. 

 

The bot was in the middle of his show when Tavros felt a hand ruffle his head. Hearing a chuckle, the boy looked up to see his father grinning and leaning over the back of his chair. "So," he began, "this is why you come home in a good mood," He chuckled again. 

 

"D-dad..." Tavros warned, slightly annoyed and failing to see the humor in his dad's words. 

 

"Fine," His father said, dejected, "but we still need to head off, kiddo. We only have, what, twenty minutes?" He informed, releasing the brakes on his sons wheels and grasping his brass handle bars. 

 

"But..!" Tavros tried to protest, but again, any attempts were futile. Despite his frivolous ways, he does care about his son. Releasing a heavy hearted sigh, the boy let himself be wheeled away. 

 

That is, until he felt unfamiliar cold hands grasp his left arm. With a shiver running down his spine, he braved a glance upward. Tavros didn't expect to see the glowing indigo eyes of the performer bot. He heard several drawled boos from the crowd but he ignored them. The clown stood there at the side of his chair, with a big grin plastered on his face, mirroring the painted one surrounding it. The boy swallowed nervously as the automaton started to slightly tug him over to the center. Tavros could only stumble out a few "umm"s and "errr"s before feeling a slight push on the back of the chair. The copper clown took it as a sign of confirmation and before Tavros could glance back, the steam bot helped himself to the handle bars of the chair and pushed him over to the middle. 

 

The automaton stopped him at the base of the fountain smiling at him and twirling toward the crowd. He heard a few whimpers of jealousy from the crowd, but for the most part, cheered on the bot and the paraplegic. Tavros spared a glance toward his father, who just stood there, clapping with a smug grin. Great. He's not doing a thing. 

 

The clown dug in the pockets of his polka dotted pants and pulled out his trademark indigo orbs. But instead of juggling them, he threw them high. About mid air, they burst into flames, causing Tavros to instinctively roll back a bit. When the orbs landed back in the bot's hands, he flicked his wrists, extinguishing the flames. The orbs were now black and white, a typical trick of the clown's, but it never failed to bring a smile to the crowd, as well as to Tavros. The copper clown flashed a smile over at the boy and skipped to his front, the bot's smile not wavering. He then held the monochrome orbs out in front of the boy. When Tavros at first didn't respond, the bot grabbed his wrists and placed the orbs in his hands, clasping the boys hands in the automaton's own copper ones. 

 

Tavros' first thought was that the orbs were stark cold. But not as cold as the automaton's hands. He shuddered involuntarily and tensed as he heard a laugh. 

 

Laugh? Did he hear that right? That was new. 

 

"Don't be so tense," a smooth, artificial voice drawled out to him. The boy blinked as he continued, "just relax, and let them miracles run all up through you." Tavros could of sworn he felt the bot grow tense when he said that, but he shrugged it off as the bot quickly regained his loose, lethargic posture, flashing out an even bigger grin on his painted face, if that were even possible. 

 

"Uhh..." Was the only intelligent reply from the mohawked boy. Lovely. In public. Tavros cursed himself, but let himself clasp onto the small orbs. He did not know what he was doing. He started to grow a little worried. What if he messed up? He's going to look like an idiot in front of the crowd and he's never going to come- Wait something's moving. Something is moving and writhing in his hands. He flashed a confused look at the bot, who just laughed. 

 

The automaton then pulled his hands apart, slowly revealing the writhing objects. The moment his hands broke apart, two white blurs flew from his hands. Looking up, Tavros found two white doves flying away from the fountain. The boy smiled. Around him, the crowd roared in approval, and the bot twirled and bowed, still holding one of Tavros' hands high in the air. The paraplegic gave a meek smile, and bowed his head afterward. It was only when the crowd started to disperse that the bot released his hand, but only to give him a big crushing hug. 

 

When the automaton finally released the boy, he gave Tavros a huge smile and ruffled his hair, making the mohawked boy giggle. He barley felt the presence of his father behind him as the bot gathered up his things and left, leaving Tavros a little bit heavy hearted. His father patted him on his back, startling Tavros, "That was fun." He simply stated. 

 

Tavros could only nod and reply, "Y-yeah." 

 

The boy couldn't stop smiling as he and his father continued their way to the doctor. 

 

\--- 

 

"Tav, please let me go with you at least." 

 

"N-no, I need to do this, on my own. Besides, I'm just going down the square. I've been there before." Tavros argued, slightly proud of himself for barely inducing a stutter. All he was going to do was run by the pharmacy. He doesn't need his dad to coddle him every time he goes out. Besides, if his dad went with him, it would take longer to go there than if Tavros went alone. 

 

Tavros' father ran a hand through his streaked hair and sighed leaning against the kitchen counter. He was about to make another attempt to dissuade him, but Tavros interrupted him, "Dad, I'll be fine." He stated. 

 

His dad sighed, "Fine. But hurry. It's getting dark." Tavros nodded and wheeled out the front door, prescription in hand. 

 

It was only late afternoon, the sun was setting and the people of Skaia seemed to be rushing home for the day. Tavros simply wheeled down the sidewalk, careful to avoid the passerby, or the occasional labor bot. He passed the fountain with a smile on his face. There was no crowd, but the memory of what happened earlier that day lingered in his mind. Wheeling away with a smile on his face, he passed the fountain to an intersection. Looking both ways, he took a breath and wheeled forward before he heard screeching. 

 

"Motherfucker! Watch out!" 

 

Hearing the strange voice he looked up to see a steam car speeding his way without stop. Tavros froze. He wanted to move, but it felt as if his arms were ice. As the car sped toward him, he felt a pair of arms around him and felt a harsh shove before it all went black.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy wakes up and while the bot undergoes repair, the boy meets a strange engineer.

Pain was the first thing registered through Tavros' mind as he slowly regained consciousness. A slow, throbbing pain through the back of his head and down his back. Groaning, he slowly tried to pry open his eyes, but only to be met with a blurry light above. Groaning again even louder, he turned his head away from the seemingly too bright light, and buried himself further into the cushions. 

Wait. Cushions? 

Ignoring the sudden flood of pain in his head, he bolted up face to face with a bright orange couch, and forcefully turned his head. Tavros widened his eyes, a shiver crawling down his spine. Shifting his weight, again ignoring the pain in his head, he turned to scan the rest of the unfamiliar room. The room was littered with bot parts, from legs and arms to bolts and wires, and everything in between. He spotted his wheelchair at the end of the couch, dented and grimy. Raising a brow, he reached over to grab his chair and inspect the damage. 

_"Motherfucker! Watch out!"_

His eyes widened as the sudden voice, then the memories, surged through his head. The speeding car, the voice, then the forceful shove, then nothing. Tavros grazed his thumb over one of the dents of the chair, wondering who his savior was. The voice sounded familiar, but he wasn't too sure, it could be his imagination playing tricks on him. 

A sudden crash and a curse was shouted in the next room over and Tavros jumped. Whoever saved him might be in the next room, he concluded. Running his hand through his brown arch of hair, he considered his options. Fidgeting on the couch, a part of the boy wanted to jump on his chair and abscond out of there as fast as he could. But instead, he shimmied into his chair the best he could and quietly, rolled into the next room. After all, it would be rude to just leave without thanking the savior, wouldn't it? 

Rolling into the hallway, he noticed that it wasn't any different than the room he was just in. More bot pieces were scattered all over the place. They all looked relatively new, but they were still collecting dust. Getting used to the bumps his wheel was making, Tavros wheeled closer to the source of the sounds. On the way, he did notice a small silver bot, attired in a small red shirt and red messenger cap, perched near a window. Looking past the bot, out the window, he noticed it was dark out. Very dark. 

Shivering, he rolled further to his destination, the urge to abscond greater than before. When Tavros finally reached the room, he found something far from what he was expecting. Sort of. 

Instead of seeing a psychopath with a wrench planning on hitting him the moment he entered (Tavros always expected the worst when it came to suspense), he found a blonde young man, a little older than him with triangular shades across his face and his hair slicked back into spikes. He was doubled over a workbench with another bot laid across it. With a wrench in hand, he was tightening the bolts in the bot's shoulder. Peering even closer, he noticed, with wide eyes, that it was the same bot that performed at the fountain, just without the normal face paint that the boy grew accustomed to. His glowing indigo eyes were also dim, indicating that he was shut off. 

Well, if he wasn't confused before, he certainly is now. 

The blonde was too engrossed in his work to notice the mohawked boy wheel himself in, his chocolate eyes not leaving the deactivated steambot. That is, until his chair hit a table near the entrance, causing a few bot parts to fall and hit the floor with a loud crash. The paraplegic silently cursed himself as the blonde slightly raised his head upward, then back down at the automaton. 

"About time you woke up." He said, deadpan. Tavros couldn't tell if he was looking at him or the bot through his shades, but the thought itself was unnerving. 

"Uh Y-yeah," the boy responded, inwardly cursing himself at the stutter. His head drifted away from the blonde and the bot, suddenly finding the discarded automaton arm on the floor more interesting. 

The blonde didn't say anything for a while, and when Tavros finally glanced back at him, he was still standing over the bot, still tightening the bolts on the clown's copper shoulder. When the blonde did finally look back at the other boy, his face didn't change from it's stoic look. Tavros cringed. 

"Are you gonna come in, or just sit there like an idiot?" 

It took a minute for the mohawked boy to respond. "Oh.. Um... S-sorry," he spat, wheeling in on impulse further into the room, careful of all the parts scattered around. Tavros could feel the other's gaze linger on him as he rolled, nervously to the workbench. 

It was quiet for another minute before the blonde pointed at the dent on his wheel with the wrench. "Need me to fix that?" He inquired, his face still stoic. Tavros fidgeted. 

"Um..." the boy shifted, his grasp tight on his damaged wheel. "N-no, it's fine." 

The other boy either didn't hear him, or chose to ignore him, because he just stood upright and tapped the empty spot next to the clown bot. "Sit." 

Tavros shifted in his seat again, but complied, not wanting to anger the stranger. He rolled up to the bench and with little effort pulled himself up and sat next to the deactivated steambot. He saw the blonde kneel over the wheelchair, wrench in hand, and detach the wheel from the chair. "Fucking thing's a mess..." He heard the blonde mutter. As the other boy walked over to the other bench across the room, he made sure to grab a few tools. More notably, a hammer. The mohawked boy shivered. The blonde spared Tavros a glance before turning to the bench. "Dirk." 

Tavros glanced over at the blonde, who was already pounding away with the hammer. "W-what?" 

"Dirk Strider. My name." He turned his head back to give Tavros another glance before continuing, "this would be the part where you'd give me yours." 

The paraplegic blinked. "Oh... It's uh, T-Tavros Nitram." He mentally slapped himself. Hard. Dirk only nodded in response and went back to fixing the wheel, leaving the other boy to his thoughts. Did Dirk save him? Or someone else? Why did he have the bot here? How did Tavros get here, and why? The boy glanced over at the quiet automaton. He looked so different without his usual face paint and large grin. 

_"Don't be so tense."_

Tavros smiled. 

_"Just relax, and let them miracles run all up through you."_

"Hey, kid," a snap of Dirk's fingers brought Tavros out of his daze as he snapped his head up to meet the blonde. "Don't mean to interrupt your trip to the memory abyss, but your chair's fixed." The boy nodded as the blonde rolled his newly repaired chair over to him. He then slid off the bench and perched himself right on the chair, rolling it a bit for good measure. Good as new. If you ignore the other scratches and dents on the rest of the chair. 

Releasing a shaky breath, he turned to the blonde, who was returning to the clown, fidgeting and tightening his grip on the wheel. Now or never. "T-thank you..." 

Dirk shook his head, "Don't thank me. Thank Gamzee when he wakes up. I just fixed your chair." 

The mohawked boy blinked, "G-Gamzee?" 

The blonde glanced at the other boy, then back at the bot. "Either you haven't been here long, or you've been living under a fucking rock." He pointed at the steambot, "This is Gamzee, the 'Miracle Bot' as the kiddos know him as. He's been here longer than I have. He saved your ass and brought it here." 

Tavros blinked as he looked the bot over again for the thousandth time. Gamzee. The boy smiled. It suited him. His smile, though, turned to a frown quick when he observed Gamzee's state. "Is... Is he okay?" He took a breath as he rolled over to the automaton once more, peering into his dimmed eyes. 

Dirk nodded, "Only a few dents and a loose shoulder. Could've been a lot worse." He patted the metal casing of the bot's shoulder, and started scanning the bot for anymore needed repairs. After spotting none, the blonde took off those strange shades and wiped his brow with his arm. A few more minutes of awkward silence followed before Dirk spoke again, putting back on his shades, "I'm going to wake him up now. Be prepared for... Whatever the hell he does." 

Tavros blinked at the warning. When Dirk pulled the automaton to a sitting position, Tavros heard several switches and slowly, steam exhaled from the bots vents and his indigo eyes slowly grew brighter. The mohawked boy instinctively reeled backward as the automaton's head slowly rose. Gamzee blinked a few times, looking his way toward Dirk, who just simply pointed at Tavros. When his indigo eyes met with Tavros', Gamzee's eyes brightened and he lunged at the boy, engulfing him in a big hug. His second from the bot today. 

"Motherfucker, you're okay! I was up and all sorts of worried for you!" Gamzee yelled . Tavros could only squeak out a few seemingly inhuman sounds of surprise before Gamzee let go of him, his glowing eyes tracing the boy for any signs of injury. "You're not motherfucking hurt, bro, are ya?" 

Tavros shook his head, "N-no, I'm fine... Um.. Thank y-you..." 

Gamzee flashed his trademark smile, a little less scary without the paint, but still unnerving to the boy, "I'm glad!" He beamed as he ruffled Tavros' Mohawk. "It's a fuckin' miracle." There. That shudder again. But Tavros ignored it, thinking it was some sort of power-up twitch. If that existed. 

Dirk shuffled behind them, coughing into his fist, trying to get their attention. "Okay, as much as I hate to break up this lovely reunion of the ages," he started to push Gamzee forward and wheel Tavros out into the hall, "I have work to do, and you two are getting in the way," the blonde glanced at the automaton, who proceeded to walk forward ahead of Tavros, "Clown, take him home. The city's a shithole at night," Dirk finished as he wheeled the mohawked boy to the living area and just promptly turned around to head back to his room. 

"Will do, Dirk-bro!" Gamzee affirmed as Dirk just waved over his shoulder and disappeared into the hall. The bot took the handles of Tavros' wheelchair and before the boy could protest, rolled the boy outside to the dark Skaia streets. The night was cold, and the boy shivered as they traveled down the seemingly abandoned street. The duo sat in a comfortable silence, the only sounds between them being the creak of the wheelchair and the small hiss of Gamzee's steam vents, simply venturing to the familiar square, before the copper bot spoke, "So, I'm just motherfuckin' going and I don't know where you live!" He laughed, making the boy a tad bit uneasy, "So tell me, my brother, where do ya hold your motherfuckin' self?" He leaned forward over the back of the chair, face-to-face with the boy. 

The mohawked boy cringed, and blushed at the sudden closeness of the automaton, but answered, praying that language doesn't fail him, "Uh..." Smooth. "The g-government housing district... Past the, um, square." Wow, hardly a stutter. Tavros felt slightly proud of that, giving the clown a small smile. 

Gamzee beamed, "I know where that is!" He exclaimed and before Tavros could blink, they were off, speeding down the square, the boy clenching the arms of the chair and Gamzee yelling in delight. 

It was the most terrifying experience Tavros ever had. But it was also the most exhilarating. 

After a few minutes of reckless speeding, the boy saw his house at the end of the street and he signaled for the bot to calm down. "Gamzee, stop...!" He stressed. The bot seemed to get the hint, as he slowed down to a brisk walk. Tavros fidgeted in his seat as they approached his house. Suddenly, he felt the toll of the day hit him hard. He almost got hit by a car, his head still hurts (thinking about it made it hurt even more), and now he was being escorted home by a clown steam bot. He did not even know how to begin to explain this to his dad. 

When he reached the front gate of his house, he grasped his wheels and looked at Gamzee, "Um, this is my stop," he muttered. He tried not to look directly at the bot's smiling face. "T-thank you... For everything." the boy finished as he started wheeling himself to the house. 

"Wait!" As Tavros turned to face the automaton, he already ran up to the boy. "I wanna know your motherfucking name." 

Tavros blinked, not really sure if he should answer, but ended up doing so anyway, "T-Tavros." 

Gamzee's grin widened, if that was even possible. He kneeled down and ruffled the boy's Mohawk, then engulfed him in another hug. "Nice name, Tavbro." He chirped, breaking the embrace, and the boy slightly blushed at the new nickname. "I'll see you later, yeah?" He asked and without thinking, Tavros nodded. With a big grin and a wave of his hand, the steambot skipped down the street out of sight. Tavros could of sworn he heard a honk or two, but he really didn't care at the moment. 

With a smile on the boy's face, Tavros wheeled right into the walkway of his house, slowly preparing himself for whatever his father may throw at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How do you Dirk?


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bot pays the boy a visit through his window.

When Tavros opened the door to his home, he was faced with, as expected, a very livid father attacking him with a barrage of questions. His father started to roll him to the living area, and for what seemed to go on almost forever, he had to sit there and listen to his father’s heated scolds and ridiculous ‘what-if’ scenarios. When Tavros finally got a word in, he explained in a stuttered mess what transpired that afternoon. He might have purposely left out Gamzee in his story- just the car almost running him over and Dirk. 

It was almost haunting how quickly his face turned from raw anger, to pure and utter distress. 

Almost as quickly as he entered the room, he was ushered out, his father ordering him to sleep and that medic bots would be there in the morning. Tavros, despite giving a few half-hearted protests, agreed and rolled himself to his room, his father still in the den already sending out the message for the medic crew. As Tavros closed the door to his room, he just simply rolled over to his bed- day clothes and all- and crawled into bed. As soon as his head hit his hard, but welcoming pillow, the events of the day caught up with him in full force as he fell into a heavy sleep, ignoring the small ghost pains in the back of his head. 

He dreamed of clown bots and magic. 

—— 

The next morning, Tavros groggily awoke to, as his father promised, the medic bots already setting up his room for testing. Meaning they were rearranging all of his furniture and personal belongings to make room for their medical equipment. Irritated, he sprung up from his bed, ignoring the sudden dizziness and keeping an eye on where the bots were taking his stuff. Last time this happened, it took him a month to find all of his favorite books and trinkets. 

When the bots finished refurnishing his room, they started the testing, which, to Tavros, felt like getting stuck with a cattle prong repeatedly. About half-way through, the doctor finally made himself present and asked the boy about the previous night’s events. His father was there- but only to serve as a silent spectator, only chiming a few health comments here and there. After almost half an hour of tedious questions and ludicrous testing by the bots (scanning equipment? How did that even get in here?), the doctor believed to have heard enough and started to go over the results. 

A bruised shoulder, a few bone fractures in his left leg (that freaked Tavros out more than he liked to admit- even if he couldn’t feel it), and a minor concussion. That one scared him. The doctor presently strode over to his father without another word as the bots started to bandage his leg. Sparing a glance to his dad and the doctor, he saw two slips of paper shoved into his father’s hands. He recognized one of the slips as a prescription, probably for the concussion. Peering at the other paper, Tavros visibly cringed. 

The bill. Great. Now more reasons to feel like a burden. 

After explaining to his dad what he needs to do to heal faster, the doctor left, rather abruptly, the bots trailing behind him, leaving his room in a disarray state. The boy’s father sighed before giving his son a weak smile, telling him to stay put in bed and that he needed to go back to the barracks soon. Walking over and planting a kiss on his son’s forehead, he left too, leaving a very disgruntled Tavros to his thoughts. 

—— 

A few days into this “house arrest” (his dad would never call it that- but it felt like it) and Tavros never felt more uneasy. And bored. The pain left him completely, only leaving him with his leg to finish healing, whenever that will be. He was prohibited from going to school, and that’s fine, he was even hoping for that, but he was also prohibited from going outside. “Not until you’re healed,” his father ordered. The mohawked boy scoffed. More for his father’s sanity, than for his own son’s safety, Tavros thinks. It disappointed him that he won’t be able to see Gamzee, but there was little he could do, and he didn’t want to risk angering his dad. 

Currently, Tavros was stationed in the kitchen in the middle of the day, scouting for something to eat. He tried opening the doors to the cabinets, but his perched up leg became an obstacle, so he gave up having to fix an actual meal. Rolling to one of the counters, he settled for an apple in one of the baskets on the surface. Taking a bite, he rolled back to his room, back to complete boredom. He could sneak out- his dad is still in the barracks, but the leg would only prove to be a complication in the streets, and plus his dad could come home early. Not a chance he’s willing to take. 

Rolling into his room, apple in hand, he cast a glance to the full view mirror in near the side wall. He didn’t know why he even had one, his dad just gave it to him one day. It only just disheartens him. Wheeling a bit to the mirror he ran a hand through his mohawk, messy from the lack of proper maintenance. He made a mental note to trim it later. 

Sighing, Tavros moved from the mirror to his bed near the end of the room. Using his upper body strength, he pushed himself on top of his bed, making sure not to bump his cast. After he got as comfortable as he could be, he skimmed around at his room, which was still in disarray from the bots a few days ago. Frowning, he made another mental note to rearrange everything back. Later, after his leg healed. 

Confident of this new plan, the boy pulled a book from under his bed, Pupa Pan, his favorite, and began reading it for the thousandth time. 

Until he heard a knock on his window. 

At first Tavros ignored it, thinking it was a tree, or his overactive imagination. Then the knock grew louder. Frowning slightly, a tad irritated that something was interrupting his reading, he looked up and nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw a black mess of hair and glowing indigo eyes staring straight at him. It took him a moment to process that it was, in fact, Gamzee, in all his copper and purple glory, grinning brightly and waving at him from outside the window. 

It took him another to figure out that he wanted to come in. 

Setting the book aside, he placed himself in his chair and wheeled to the window, letting the steam bot inside. Normally Tavros wouldn’t do something like this, but then again, normally people (or steam bots that recently saved him), don’t come knocking at his window. After unlatching the window and raising it enough for Gamzee, the mohawked boy reeled back, letting the languid bot step into his room. 

“’Bout time you motherfuckin’ answered, Tavbro,” He greeted with a large smile as he brushed by a very confused Tavros, “I almost up and thought that you weren’t ever gonna look up from that motherfuckin’ book!” Gamzee twirled a bit, glancing left and right, before stopping at the foot of Tavros’ bed, facing him with a face splitting smile. 

Tavros was a little more than uncomfortable with this. The steam bot that saved him a few days ago, appears out of nowhere and, albeit with Tavros’ help, is currently standing in his unorganized room, staring down the boy like Tavros was the one who saved Gamzee. But strangely, he felt more uncomfortable with the state of his room, rather than Gamzee’s sudden visit. 

“Uh…” Tavros took a deep breath in and tried to regain what little thoughts he had. “G-Gamzee, why… Why are you h-here? Not that I, uh, don’t want you to be here! It’s j-just, um…” That earned himself a few mental slaps. Tavros was about to let out another language massacre before the clown bot interrupted him. 

“I just thought I’d check on a motherfucker,” he said in his smooth, artificial voice, “you weren’t at that water place for a motherfuckin’ bit, and it was all kinds of lonely without my favorite watching bro.” Gamzee grinned at the mohawked boy before deciding to take a seat on his bed, all while still looking at Tavros. 

The paraplegic blushed and turned his head away from the automaton. Favorite? Surely he didn’t mean it. He was just a faceless nobody stuck in a wheelchair. Braving a glance back at the bot, he saw that Gamzee was still staring at him innocently, like he didn’t say anything wrong. Tavros couldn’t help but smile, though. “T-thank you… I guess,” He muttered as he started to wheel over to his bed, being extra careful of his leg. 

The clown bot beamed. Tavros situated himself back on his bed with his back resting against the headboard. Gamzee spun around and mindlessly poked at the cast on the boys leg. “What all this for, bro?” 

Tavros shivered, trying to come up with audible sounds to answer, “Uh.. Well, my leg, k-kinda broke, that night…” he stuttered, trying not to let his voice go too low. 

Gamzee’s smile instantly disappeared. “Aww shit, Tav…” He groaned, “Motherfuck, I didn’t mean to all up and push ya that hard… Aw fuck…” He then started to stumble out apology after apology, running a copper hand trough his messy mane of hair. Tavros tried to stop his ramble, but it only made it worse. So he did the next thing he could think of. 

He threw one of his playing cards at him. The card bounced off him. He wished he hadn’t done that. 

As stupid as that was, he succeeded in quieting Gamzee. Looking at the steam bot, he stated, “G-Gamzee, you did nothing wrong. You s-saved my life, and I’m glad. So please… Calm down? Maybe?” Tavros didn’t know how he got the sudden burst of confidence, but it felt good, and Gamzee seemed to have calmed down, a hint of a smile returning on his copper features. 

“Really?” 

“R-really.” 

Gamzee’s smile returned in full force and Tavros couldn’t help but smile back. The automaton’s grin was almost contagious. Gamzee then shot his head back and forth, looking for something, “Hey, bro,” he inquired as he started getting up and rummaging through one of the mohawked boy’s drawers lining his room, “You have, like, motherfuckin’ pens or markers or somethin’…?” 

Tavros blinked, confused by the sudden action, “Um,” His eyes followed Gamzee shifting drawer to drawer as he tried to think of a good answer. Finally, he pointed to the dresser next to the bathroom door, “I, uh, think they’re in there…” 

Gamzee followed his direction and started going through the cabinets. After a few minutes he let out an “Ah Ha!” before pulling out a multitude of colored markers. Picking out the purple one (of course), he sat next to the boy’s cast, and with a grin started writing, the angle of Gamzee blocking his cast. 

“Gamzee? What are you, uh, doing?” 

“You’ll see, bro.” 

A few minutes later Gamzee rose from his spot, revealing dark purple letters across the cast, and sat back in his original spot across from Tavros. The boy arched a brow and examined the words written in alternated caps: 

_I’m So SoRrY aBoOt ThIs! I hOpE iT hEeLs SoOn! HoNk! :o)_

A large smile threatened to break Tavros’ face in two as he read the small message. It was so touching, he didn’t even notice the spelling mistakes in it. Nor did he care. He only had something like this happen to him once- back in Prospit, he and Jake were playing rather roughly and as a result Tavros broke his arm. Jake later apologized, and signed the cast in dark green letters. It was a bittersweet memory though- Vriska wrote several obscenities and profanity on it to the point where the binding had to be removed. 

Gamzee bounced a bit on the bed, eagerly awaiting a reaction. The boy regarded him with a smile, “Thank you, Gamzee… It’s very, uh, n-nice.” He cursed himself at his choice of words, but it seemed the bot didn’t mind one bit, as his smile grew bigger (how does it keep doing that…?) and bounced a little bit more. 

“No problem, brother!” He chirped. After a while of small, comfortable silence, the bot started to squirm. “So, what do you up and do for motherfuckin’ fun around here?” 

Tavros squirmed too, involuntarily, before he answered with a small voice “W-well, I just either read… Or play my card games…” He remembered the card he threw at the bot a bit ago. He couldn’t see it where he was sitting. 

“Really, Tavbro? Like what?” 

“I just, um, play Fiduspawn, mostly…” 

“Oh! I’ve heard of that! I’ve seen all those motherfuckin’ kids play it. It looks fun.” 

“Y-yeah.. I like it…” 

“You think you can all up and teach a motherfucker?” 

“Uh… S-sure… If you want to…” 

“Miracles.” Twitch. 

They ended up playing until sunset. When the boy’s father came home, he found a very happy Tavros sitting on his bed rearranging his cards and placing them on his bedside table. He saw the purple writing on his cast, but decided not to ask, only going to start dinner for the two of them. He’ll ask later.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy through the bots eyes.

Gamzee wanted to get close to the boy. 

The bot didn't know what little miraculous (you're STILL trying to BELIEVE in that? REALLY?) feature it was. The bitchtits hair, those big- what's that human food called? Oh!- chocolate eyes, or that shy little personality that boy's got. Hell, it could even be that chair. He didn't know. All he knew was that ever since he saw the boy for the first time at that fountain-place weeks ago, the automaton wanted to meet him. 

He wanted to be all kinds of subtle about it though- the kid looks so fucking timid- and when weeks came and went, a little opportunity reared its miraculous (STOP it) head. Gamzee wasn't too sure what made him go to the boy right when that other bitchtits looking dude started to pull him away, but the bot was glad he did. And the amount of mirth in the boy's eyes when he did the last trick with him was worth it. 

Miracles. (you MOTHERFUCKING idiot) 

Later, when the bot saw the boy out on the town, he couldn't see no reason to all up and say hi. As he started to approach the boy, Gamzee heard screeching on the road ahead. He knew what it was before he saw it. When the boy crossed the road, the screeches grew louder and the bot ran. He called out, but no response came from the boy as he froze on the street. It was a motherfucking miracle (he wasn't WORTH IT) that he pushed him out of the way in time. It was so close that he felt that chair of his hit his shoulder, ricocheting off that four wheel steam death box. 

His think pan was telling him to go up after the steam box, but his heart gear was telling him to stay with the boy and take him to safety. Normally, he would listen to his think pan, it never steered him wrong, but after looking at the passed out boy in his arms, the choice wasn't hard. 

Dirk-bro was very helpful, if not a bit quiet, of the boy. Although when it came down to it, the engineer was more worried about the automaton's arm. When he was finished with the boy, he was ushered to the repair room where the bot was reassured that the boy would still be there when he awoke. 

And he was. When the bot processed his chocolate hair and big eyes, Gamzee couldn't be anymore elated, and pulled the boy into a big motherfuckin' hug. He felt the boy tense but the bot didn't really care. After he let go, he was glad to see that the boy suffered light injuries (at least he hoped so. Gamzee didn't know the first thing about human health). It wasn't too long after that Dirk-bro sent them on their way. Or kicked them out. Whatever. Gamzee was too elated that the boy was okay to really give a fuck. After Gamzee's speedy escort to the boy's house, he reluctantly had to part ways with him. 

But he learned his name. Tavros. 

Gamzee ran back to the workshop, a few honks following him, genuinely happy for the first time in what seemed to be forever. 

He was even happier after he saw Tavros a few days later, in his room, contently reading a book on his little bed. His heart gear spiraled rapidly in his chest cavity. He almost didn't want to go in there and interrupt the boy. But the bot did. 

And he didn't regret it. 

Miracles. (NO) 

Gamzee slowly poked at the windowsill lightly, not only opening it slightly, but to also alert the boy on the other side. Ever since the bot's unexpected visit to the chocolate boy almost a week ago, it's almost been routine to visit him. Through his window. Tavbro said that it might alert the male parental unit, so the bot had to all up and sneak in through the window. Not that he minded. Tavbro even left the window unlatched just for him. 

Tavbro, on the other side, picked up his head and offered a wave to the bot and signaled him in. Miracles (SHUT up). Gamzee slowly opened the window and with a "Hey, Tavbro," lazily crawled in and shut the glass behind him. After straightening himself up, he strode over to the bed where the chocolate boy was sitting, his trademark grin never leaving his painted copper face. 

Tavros perked up at the bot and beamed. "Hi, Gamzee," the boy chirped, shifting himself to face the automaton. The chocolate boy smiled slightly, which in turn made Gamzee grin even wider. As the clown bot took his usual spot at the foot of Tavbro's bed, the boy already got those bitchtits playing cards out. "My dad's not going to, uh, be here until much, um, later," the boy informed, "so, umm, you can s-stay here longer… If you want to, that is…" Tavros trailed of, his gaze down at the cards. 

Gamzee blinked. Did he even need to ask? " 'Course, bro!" He exclaimed a little louder, and quicker, than he intended. Tavbro looked up at the bot and giggled before turning his attention to the cards and shuffling them. Gamzee decided to take this chance to look the boy over. He didn't look too different from the previous times the automaton saw him- his hair was messy, his clothes were wrinkled, and there was a slight blush on his tan skin. He also noticed that the cast he had on his leg was gone (thank the Messiahs, every time he saw it, he felt very guilty). It didn't take too long for the bot to start spacing out right there in front of the boy. He'd been doing that a lot lately.

"G-Gamzee?" The bot snapped out of the maze of his think pan back to reality before blinking lazily at the boy before him, who was shifting in his seat uncomfortably. Why is he doing that? It's just Gamzee. "Um… You're staring…" 

Oh. That's right. The automaton blinked once more before his trademark grin spread across his face once more. Shaking his head, the bot briskly brushed off the statement. "We're gonna up and have a motherfucking game or what?" 

Tavbro smiled and nodded before passing out the cards in front of them. They didn't ever play the game long- Gamzee often dazed off and forgot what he was supposed to be doing and Tavbro would get a little frustrated over repeating the rules every five minutes. An hour into the game they both gave up, deciding to end the friendly game in a draw. But Gamzee wasn't about to let the visit turn dull. Never on his miraculous (fucking LIE) copper core. He started performing card tricks to amuse the boy. After all, that's what he's made for. After that, the bot told countless stories from the streets of Skaia. All to keep his favorite chocolate boy entertained. 

"… And this motherfucker just up and pops out of fuckin' nowhere and tries to fight off this bot, right?" Gamzee almost shouted to the boy, who was across from the bot on the bed clutching a pillow. "And this bot wasn't the normal motherfuckers you see draggin' around on the streets 'round here, it was one of them fancier, fightin' motherfuckers from the bigger part of town. Anyway, this dude just goes up and starts fighting the brother! With his own fucking fists!" 

"No way!" Tavros shouted in disbelief, holding the pillow tighter. Motherfucking cute. The automaton's grin grew wider and he shifted in his seat a little before continuing the story. 

"Swear on my motherfuckin' copper core! As all the little tykes are getting up and dragged off by their motherfuckin' parental units-" Tavbro chuckled at that phrase- "the big guy and the bot are going at it and I'm just standing there all confused and shit and my think pan's all up and telling me I should get the fuck outta there." As Gamzee continued the story about the fist fight involving an army steam bot and some regular passerby, the bot heard the front door open. Tavdad's back. 

Upon hearing the door, Tavros perked his head up, a smile already forming, "Dad's home," he whispered, "a lot earlier then I, um, thought… Maybe-" He was cut off by a series of laughs and giggles. Female giggles. Hearing that made the boy's smile falter and turn into a full blown frown. That, in turn, made the steambot frown. The chocolate boy shifted in his seat, "…He brought, s-someone," he said in a meek whisper. 

When Gamzee tried to inquire about his parental unit, the boy shook his head, "I-it's, um, common. I'm used, to it, I mean," He stammered, looking down at the pillow in his arms. He flinched when they heard a very high pitched moan from the other room. "I just… Uh, wish h-he'd be careful." He finished with a sigh, pressing his face against the pillow. 

The bot didn't like this. Not one bit. The boy should be all smiles. Not whatever this is. The bot was just about to voice this before he was struck with a bitchtits idea. Standing up from the bed, he strode over to the window. "A-are you, leaving?" the bot heard the boy's small voice speak up behind him as he opened the window. 

Gamzee didn't even bother to turn around, "Yep, bro," and before he could feel the sad protests coming from the chocolate boy, he turned to him, flashing a grin, "And you're motherfuckin' comin' with." 

The boy shuffled in his seat, staring at the bot. "W-what..?" He was nervous. Cute. 

"Yep, it wouldn't seem right to just up and leave without my motherfuckin' best bro." Leaving the window open, he walked over to the wheelchair parked next to the bed. Hearing the slight whine of protest from the boy behind him, he lifted the chair quietly over the window ledge and onto the grassy yard out back. Turning around to the fidgeting boy on the bed, he grinned wider. 

Tavbro caught on pretty quickly and shivered, holding the pillow. "W-what if my dad…?" 

The bot laughed quietly and lifted the boy from the bed, who was writhing and whining in protest. "He's obviously too motherfucking busy. C'mon, it's just for a little bit. When you get back, I promise he wouldn't have up and noticed your disappearance." He tried to reassure the boy, who was still wiggling in protest. After the bot stepped outside, he stopped completely and just whimpered, dropping the pillow over the ledge. 

"A-are you, um, sure?" He piped up when the bot placed him on his chair unceremoniously. 

"Of course, Tavbro, now shush and let them miracles shine up on you." Twitch. Gamzee didn't know why he kept doing that. The bot started rolling them to the street before Tavbro spoke up again. 

"Where are we going…?" 

"One of my favorite motherfuckin' places in the world." Was the automaton's only reply as he wheeled the nervous boy. Eventually Tavros gave up with a sigh and clutched the armrests of his bitchtits chair. The bot chuckled and ruffled the boy's soft hair. 

Motherfucking miracles. 

(is he really WORTH THE RISK?)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bot takes the boy to his home.

He was going to die. 

At least that's what Tavros kept thinking as Gamzee guided him down the dark streets of Skaia. As the clown rolled Tavros to wherever he had planned, the boy tensed up and gripped the armrests. He shouldn't be freaking out. It's just Gamzee. It's just the bot that saved his life little more than a week ago. Tavros took a shaky breath, trying to calm his self down. When the chair hit a stray pebble on the road, Tavros jumped with a small squeak and his thoughts quickly reverted to his impending doom. He was going to die in a horrible, painful death and he wouldn't be found until days later and- why is Gamzee laughing? 

"Tavbro? You okay? Didn't mean to up and motherfuckin' scare ya, bro." Tavros heard Gamzee speak up after he slowly raised his head to meet the automaton's. The boy, of course, found a smiling face, with soft glowing indigo eyes, looking down at him. Tavros couldn't tell if that was good or bad. 

"Y-yeah… I'm, fine…" He lied. Gamzee eyed him for a moment before giving a shrug and ruffling his light chocolate Mohawk. The contact made him shiver. 

"Whatever you say, Tavbro." And the bot left it at that. 

The rest of the stroll was silent, save for the mohawked boy's shuttering breath and the bot's light footsteps. It reminded Tavros of the night of the accident, when Gamzee walked the boy home. The memory brought a quiet sigh from the boy as he straightened up and calmed down. There was no reason to act like this. Deep breaths, he can do this. 

It wasn't too long until they hit the old, unfortunate side of town. The steam was heavy here as Gamzee and Tavros continued to trek the dark road, lit only by the meager side lights. Looking at all the neglected, deteriorated houses, and the occasional wayward drunk, Tavros suppressed a shiver before looking back at the clown. He still had that nonchalant smile on his face, like walking through a very bad part of town was normal. Must be nice. 

After a few minutes strolling down the street, the bot finally stopped. Blinking, the mohawked boy turned to face a rusty old building, no different than the others they had passed on the way. Looking back at the bot, Tavros saw the same smile plastered on his face, if not bigger. "Gamzee…" The boy began to inquire before the bot rolled him to the entrance. 

"Home sweet motherfuckin' home, Tav," The clown chirped before the boy could get another word in. Home? Before the boy could question Gamzee, the bot rolled him over to the entrance. The automaton paused a moment, opening the door in front of them, before wheeling Tavros into the dark building. When he crossed the threshold, he started fidgeting again. 

After a few minutes of adjusting to the darkness, the bot took off, leaving a very uneasy Tavros in the dark, alone, squirming in his chair. The boy took in a few deep breaths in a failed attempt to calm himself down, before hearing rustling. Whipping his head forward, he saw Gamzee's two glowing indigo eyes darting back and forth in the shadows. A few moments of searching and a few curses later, the bot gave a loud "Ah-ha!" before a few bright lights illuminated the room. Shielding himself immediately from the sudden lights, Tavros gave himself a little to adjust. Deeming himself ready, he turned his gaze to the room ahead. 

All of the mohawked boy's previous fear and uneasiness melted away into pure wonder. The room was lined with beautiful copper, gold and silver trinkets of all shapes sizes and forms, slightly twinkling under the dimly lit lamps. From the furthest left wall he could see copper mannequins adorned with eloquent formal wear with accessorized timepieces to flamboyant jester robes to normal everyday clothing, but, like the others, still stood out like the rest. To the right, the wall was covered in massive blueprints and littered with copper bot parts and ornaments, and a wide range of tools. And everywhere in between, hanging from the ceiling and sitting around on scattered worktables, were a multitude of brilliantly crafted decorations and knick-knacks, from wind chimes to clocks to model steam trains. Tavros gave a shaky breath, afraid to move, before his eyes met Gamzee's, who fit in beautifully with the scene around him.

"What do ya think, Tavbro?" the bot shifted back and forth, his grin bigger than ever, as he gestured to the rest of the room with his extended copper arm. 

What could he think? Tavros couldn't say anything let alone think. The boy was so entranced by the room alone that he nearly forgot to breathe. "It's…" He started weakly. As the boy tried to gather his thoughts, the clown waltzed over and grasped the handle bars of his chair and pushed him forward, maneuvering over the tight turns and corners, breaking whatever train of thought Tavros had. 

"I should be getting my explain on about all these motherfucking wonders and shit." 

The bot took a few moments to describe the various trinkets that cluttered the many tables. It was very soothing hearing Gamzee ramble and Tavros allowed himself to be swept away by his words and the sights of the room. The mohawked boy mentally cursed himself for thinking the bot would hurt him in any way as he eagerly listened to the bot and lightly commented on whatever piece Gamzee was showing him. 

Passing by a dark staircase, which Gamzee abruptly ignored surprisingly, the duo ended up in what seemed to be a normal living area. It was fairly plain compared to the rest of the shop, but not without its charm. There was a couch, a couple of tables, each with a small array of copper parts and trinkets, and a very large bookshelf. Large enough to span almost two walls. Tavros' eyes widened. 

"Old Man sometimes up and relaxes himself here," Gamzee confirmed before rolling the boy further down into the den. Gamzee's mentioned this "Old Man" several times during the tour, but every time Tavros inquires, the bot would brush it off or abruptly change the subject. The mohawked boy eventually dropped the topic, assuming that maybe he was the clown's creator or an engineer, but he was still curious. 

Tavros took the wheels of his chair back and maneuvered to the bookshelf without delay. Behind him, the boy heard the bot chuckle, amused at the boy's eagerness. Tavros' eyes glued themselves to the spines of each book as he read their titles. From steam flying pirates to magic artificers, to The Midnight Crew: Skaia's most feared mob. The bot had it all. 

Composing himself, he tried to will himself to speak, to inform Gamzee that this is all amazing, before the spine of another particular title jumped at him. Looking down, he saw his favorite book, Pupa Pan, in all its glory. Reaching out to grab it, the boy noticed dusty smudges around the book, suggesting that it had been used recently. 

"I tried to read that motherfucker once." Tavros jumped when he saw Gamzee in the corner of his eye, crouching down and leaning against the boy's chair. "You always got your cute little face in that motherfuckin' book, figured I'd up and give it a shot." 

Tavros blushed a deep scarlet and shook himself out of his thoughts long enough to reply. "Did you, um, like it..?" He asked, smiling, holding up the said book. 

The automaton shook his head. "Couldn't read the motherfucker. All the words started to blend and stretch all up in my think pan 'till I don't know which word's what," he explained without a missing beat. "Old Man never motherfuckin' took it upon himself to teach me most of it." Gamzee lowered his head, a small sad smile crossing his painted face. 

The boy nodded, heart sinking a small bit. He doesn't like this look one bit. Gamzee and sad just don't mix. With an idea popping into his mind, Tavros patted his hand on top of the bot's head, coaxing him to look at the boy. "Um," he held the book up a little, "would you like me, to, uh, read it? For you?" He asked, lamely. 

Gamzee beamed at the boy. With a quick, "You're sure, Tavbro?" And after a confirming nod from Tavros, the bot smiled brightly and, much to the boy's surprise, lifted him from the chair as he squeaked in protest, then carried him to the couch. Gamzee sat down, the boy still in his arms, and shifted him chest to back. Tavros sat there, blushing madly, shifting in the bot's embrace. This was very odd for the boy. He'd never been in this situation before, and the bot wasn't normally this affectionate, aside from some tight hugs here and there. But Tavros, despite having a metal knee dug into his ribs and the bot's metal arm joints pinching his shoulder, loved it. 

It almost scared him how much. 

The mohawked boy looked up at Gamzee, who simply peered down at him with those piercing indigo eyes waiting for him to start. Taking in a deep breath, the boy looked down back at the book, shifting away from the bot's knee probing him. The bot stirred a bit, supporting the boy better and in favor of hugging his waist rather than his shoulders. Tavros, deciding that it was either now or never, opened the book, Gamzee's eyes providing enough light, and with a shaky breath, started to recite the words he knows so well. 

\--- 

The words flew out of his mouth seamlessly, without any hesitation or a stutter of any kind. The thought of that made Tavros' confidence soar. As he continued to read the novel, he couldn't help but notice the reactions coming from Gamzee. The bot would lean forward during the action parts, smile and laugh at the fun parts, and hug him tightly at the sad. When Pupa flew for the first time, Gamzee smiled, with his indigo eyes lighting up brightly, muttered the word "miracles" and hugged him even tighter. He twitched, again, but it didn't break whatever spell that captured the two. 

Hours flew by and the boy wasn't even finished with the novel before showing the first signs of fatigue. He started reading slower, and yawned at a few places. The bot gave a small chuckle before grabbing the book from the boy's hands and placing it on the table. Before Tavros could make any sounds of protest, the bot announced that it was time for the boy to go home and embraced him tightly. 

The way home was a blur, all Tavros could remember was Gamzee pushing him silently down the road to his house, his glowing eyes serving as a source of light. It was also a blur how he got in his house. He remembers though, the bot carefully laying him down on his bed without a sound, his wheelchair not long after. He also remembers something warm peck his forehead, and before Tavros could comprehend what happened, he remembers seeing Gamzee wave to him on his windowsill with his trademark grin before leaving into the city. 

Sleep came easily to him as he dreamed about Pupa Pan and steam fliers and a certain clown named Gamzee. 

_Beautiful._


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy and the bot have a small heart to heart-gear.

Tavros had a very long day.

After his week of absence, his father thought that it was time for him to go back to school. The boy had little to say in the matter, so, with some resistance from time and hygiene, he tediously made his way to the droning learning facility. It was just as he remembered, long, boring and no one spared him a second glance, even with his extended leave. During his lessons, the mohawked boy grew crestfallen at the familiar routine, cringing at the ticking of every clock in the room. What is it with this country’s fascination with clocks? He smiled, though, when his drifting thoughts landed on a certain clown bot, and the events that transpired the night before. And with that the day seemed to go a little faster, in hopes that the boy could see the grinning steambot at the fountain.

Fate, however, seemed to have different plans, in the form of his father nearly scaring him to death when Tavros left the school. Grabbing the handlebars to Tavros’ chair, much to the boy’s displeasure, his father rolled him to the richer side of town, away from the fountain, with a grin on his face. “I’m taking ya to the barracks,” he explained. “You don’t need to be cooped up in the house all day, so I’m gonna show ya around.” Translation: There’s a chick I wanna woo, so I’m going to use the whole ‘disabled son, good dad’ bit to get her. Tavros groaned, unnoticed by his dad, willingly letting his father push him to their destination, eager to get this over with.

It’s reasons like this why it’s hard to convince people that he’s not a bad father.

The ‘tour’ wasn’t bad, nonetheless. There wasn’t too much to see, but it was still fun. Tavros saw the woman, a normal foot soldier as far as the boy could tell, his dad was trying to swoon, but she brushed him off with a cold shoulder. Tavros chuckled, and his dad threatened to ground him. Surprisingly, his dad kept true to his word and continued the tour. The soldiers were nice, a few of them even ruffled the boy’s mohawk (which was incredibly unnecessary and uncomfortable), and steam bots ran around carrying various weapons and parts like it was doomsday. Tavros even got to see an Imperial steam flier, which made the boy gawk for a good few minutes. He made a mental note to tell Gamzee about this.

The trip ended abruptly, however, and on a nasty note. When he and his father headed back, another soldier, one of a bulky build and dark crazy hair, called out to Tavros’ dad. At first he ignored it, but the second call almost made him jump out of his skin. When the mohawked boy turned around, his father was already addressing him, fiercely. The first thing the boy noticed on the warrior was the messed up face-paint and he reeled back in his chair in response. Few words were exchanged between them before the big soldier took off, chuckling. When his father made his way back to Tavros’ chair, the boy could tell he was fuming.

But he saw that familiar glint in his eyes before his father sent him off. The boy cringed. They do not make walls thick enough.

It was late in the afternoon when Tavros raced to the square, worried that he might have missed Gamzee. But sure enough, when he got there the bot in question was perched on the edge of the fountain, absentmindedly juggling. It was too late for any real spectators and anyone who passed barely gave him a second glance. As soon as the bot noticed the boy, he got up, put his orbs away, and approached Tavros, and before the mohawked boy could offer an apology or an explanation for his delay, the clown embraced him tightly, hoisting him from his wheelchair. After a few moments, Gamzee put him back down and lethargically strode to Tavros’ handlebars, rolling him up out of the less-than-busy square, starting up small talk along the way.

And the boy let him, with a smile.

-

“I think, my dad is… hinting toward a career, in the, uh, military.”

Gamzee turned his head away from the dove cages in front of him to give Tavros a skeptical grin. “Really, bro? You don’t really up and look like the motherfuckin’ ‘run and gun’ type, Tav.” The bot chuckled a bit at the last part. He wasn’t trying to offend, especially with his choice of words, but just to make a simple observation.

The boy shrugged, slumped over, arms crossed, over one of the nearby tables in Gamzee’s backyard, watching the bot as he feeds his birds. “I-I know, but… When he showed me around, the, um, barracks he talked about the place, like, he built the barracks, and the army, by himself. With pride.” Something the boy wished he had at least a little of.

“Maybe the brother just likes what he motherfuckin’ does,” the bot chimed as he grabbed some more feed.

Tavros shrugged again, “Maybe…” he settled, not arguing with the bot’s logic. In the corner of the boy’s eyes, he saw the bot pouring the last of the bird feed into the little bowl in the cage and closed it, watching as the little white birds scrambled around in the cage to their dinner. The clown then made his way to the mohawked boy, silently pulling him away from the table. Next thing the boy knew, he was being lifted from the chair by Gamzee and the clown laid the boy on the not-so-green grass, the steam bot following next to him. As the clown snaked an arm around the boy, the said boy flushed deeply and chuckled. He didn’t mind any of this. Like last night, he felt more than comfortable being this close. The bot snuggled deeper into the boy, letting a loose automatic sigh.

Letting out a sigh of his own, the boy looked up at the sky, the bright blue of the daytime darkening as the sun sets, turning the sky above them into a canvas of oranges, reds, purples, indigos and ending in the dark blue the night is known for. Peering deeper into the darkening sky, Tavros spotted a couple of lone birds fly across the welkin, almost invisible. The boy blinked, remembering what he wanted to tell the bot.

“I saw… A steam flier, over at the barracks, too.” Tavros started, glancing to his side at Gamzee, who just laid there next to the boy, his gaze transfixed on his friend before him.

“Really?” Gamzee questioned as his ever present smile ceased to falter, “Those motherfuckers are hard to come by these days.”

Gamzee, unfortunately, was right. Due to recent pirate and bandit attacks, luxury, tour, transportation, even simple cargo fliers, little by little, all have been weeded out from the sky. All except the military grade. It’s not illegal to fly, at least Tavros hopes not, it’s just very risky.

“When… I was younger, my dad took me on a, uh, flier… back on Prospit,” Tavros reminisced. In the corner of his eye he could see Gamzee’s indigo orbs flicker. “It was just a tour thing though,” he added. “I remembered that if I closed my eyes and held my arms out, I could almost see Pupa Pan fly next to us.” The boy chuckled.

“Well aren’t you just a regular motherfuckin’ Wendy, Tavbro.” He heard the bot speak next to him in a chuckle.

Tavros feigned a gasp and playfully punched the bot on the shoulder. “Shut up!” The boy laughed as the bot put up a hand in mock surrender, laughing just as much, if not more. A few minutes later, the laughter died down to a few chuckles and giggles, and the boy let out a content sigh, that also ended in a breathy chuckle.

Sometimes, Tavros just forgets that the clown steambot isn’t human.

“When I, was younger…” The boy started once more, “I wanted, to be a captain, of big flier.” Like last night, with the story, there was hardly a stutter, hardly any falter in his normally mild, timid voice as he told Gamzee his dreams of the skies. To fly. To travel. To find hidden cities of myth and legend. To love. After each sentence formed, the bot’s smile grew and his eyes brightened, like he shared the same dreams. As he kept sharing, as he kept pouring what he had to Gamzee, Tavros couldn’t help but fear the inevitable. Something the boy knows that’s been drilling into the bot’s mind since they met. The dreaded question: What happened?

When his words of dreams and memories died down to nothing but silence, the boy braced himself, looking up at the sky. It wasn’t until the mohawked boy noticed that it was almost completely dark did Gamzee say something. What he said surprised him.

“Let’s up and take one.”

Blinking, Tavros turned his head back at the clown, who had a ridiculous smile and eyes glowing brightly. Like he’s serious.

Tavros hopes he isn’t serious.

“W-what?” The surprised boy voiced.

Propping himself up to a sitting position Gamzee loomed over the boy, his grin never leaving it’s place, his synthetic voice all but boomed in the serene backyard, “We should motherfuckin’ take one. And we do all of that, bro. From flyin’ to where ever and seeing all kinds o’ motherfuckin’ shit,” Gamzee’s eyes sparked with life and his grin grew with every second he spoke, “to just finding shit no one else up and been to! We can do it!” His entire frame shook with enough excitement to compete with a child in a toy store. “It’ll be nothing but motherfuckin miracles.” The boy saw that ever present twitch, it was almost a pattern now, but it was nothing but a small jerk.

The boy, pushing himself up to a sitting position (with a little help from Gamzee), could only quietly chuckle next to him. The steambot sounded so serious, it was almost scary. A part of Tavros wanted to believe him though, to say yes and fly away with him, but of course the rational side of him, the side of him that reminds him that he’s crippled, crept back in like a parasite and dissuaded the boy. But, pushing the sad thoughts away, he didn’t have the heart to lie to the bot, nor to push reality onto him, so he smiled, “Maybe… Someday.” The boy promised.

Gamzee beamed, seemingly stated with this answer, and reached over to the boy to give him the biggest hug the clown has ever given him. The mohawked boy returned the embrace with as much vigor, smiling and laughing. Being the one to break it, the boy tugged on the sleeve of the black shirt the bot was wearing, “Take me, inside. It’s, um, getting dark. And we could, finish Pupa Pan,” Tavros said, a little too hopeful. Gamzee made a sound of confirmation and with little resistance, lifted the boy and carried him to the couch inside, watching Gamzee go back out to cover the birds and grab the boy’s wheelchair.

A week. He’s only known the bot a week and here they are, laughing, smiling, sharing dreams and talking about the future with each other, as if they’ve been friends all their lives. Tavros smiled slightly at the thought as the clown came back with his chair in tow, parking it in front of the couch. Gamzee then grabbed the book from the shelf and all but skipped over to the boy, sitting with his back to the armrest and situating Tavros in between his legs with his back to the bot’s chest. The boy blushed darkly but made an attempt to move as he opened the book and read the rest of his favorite story to the steambot, who in turn eagerly huddled the boy close, tuning everything out other than the boy’s words.

As he read, the boy caught a glimpse of Gamzee’s metal hand resting on Tavros’ unresponsive right knee. The boy found himself staring at it. It wasn’t a bad gesture, and Gamzee probably didn’t even know he was doing it. To the copper bot it was just a simple, necessary need to touch. But the wheelchair bound boy couldn’t feel it. He could feel Gamzee’s other arm snaked around his waist, just not the hand on his knee.

The boy didn’t know why it mattered, but it did.

Tavros must of stopped reading, because the bot nudged him a little, lifting the somehow-too-offensive limb from the boy’s leg and poking his shoulder. “Tavbro?”

“I got, pushed off a c-cliff,” the boy whispered before he could stop himself. Slowly, he turned his head to meet Gamzee’s, who only frowned in confusion. But he seemed to catch on quick, as he had a look of realization, and shook his head.

“Tav, you don’t need to tell me a thing.”

“Gamzee, please,” Tavros insisted, turning his torso around awkwardly to meet him better, “I… want to.” He took a deep breath, pursing his lips. He trusted Gamzee, so it was only fair that he knew the boy that he saved.

The clown blinked, his eyes glowing with uncertainty, but ultimately said nothing as he lifted the boy to a better sitting position next to him. After the bot did the same he looked to Tavros, who was looking for the right words to say. Finally after what seemed to be an eternity of gathering his thoughts, the boy spoke of the incident that smashed his dreams to a million pieces, with Gamzee next to him, rubbing his forearm in comforting circles.

First, Tavros spoke of Vriska. Of how she bullied him whenever she wanted to play. Of how she broke his arm when she pushed him off the play set. Of how she would put spiders in his hair when he wasn’t looking. How she would taunt, ridicule and flat out embarrass the poor boy.

“She sounds motherfuckin’ horrible.” Gamzee chimed in, this time just holding the boy’s hand. Tavros blushed slightly, but squeezed it, nodding in agreement. He continued the story, this time starting with Vriska taking the boy to the forest. To the cliff. She dared him. He declined. She called him out. He wanted to prove her wrong. He crept closer to the edge. He turned to gloat. She pushed. Blinding pain. Then nothing.

At this point, both were clutching each other’s hands in a vice grip, Tavros from reliving that horrible memory and Gamzee from sure anger. At least that’s what the boy caught when he looked up at the bot. His eyes were glowing a violent purple, rather than the lazy indigo it normally sported, and the boy’s hand was growing numb from his grip.

“Tav…” Gamzee stressed out, his voice almost cracking, “How could…How could any motherfucker do that to you?”

Tavros shook his head, “I-I don’t, uh, know… Gamzee…” the boy could hear the bot’s inner gears whirl at an alarming rate and the steam exhaust started to make a high pitched whistle, startling the boy.

“Seriously, Tavbro, you do not motherfucking deserve that.” He continued, holding his gaze to the startled boy in front of him. “You are a miracle,” _violent_ twitch, “And-“

“G-Gamzee!” Tavros grabbed his shoulder with his free hand and shook him with what little power he had. It seemed to work, as the bot grew wide eyed and loosened his grip on the boy’s hand. His inner workings were running at normal rate, and the steam stopped flowing with an ear numbing shriek. His eyes, though, still remained that bright purple. Tavros didn’t like it.

“…What happened to her..?” Gamzee timidly asked, not too sure if he’d like the answer.

Tavros took in a deep breath, gathering his thoughts, “I don’t, know… I haven’t heard too, much from h-her after that. We just moved across P-Prospit and, um, moved on the best we could…”

“So nothing bad happed to her?”

“Gamzee…”

“I mean, she motherfuckin’ hurt you, Tav.” The bot rationalized.

“I know, Gamzee but…” The mohawked boy gave an exhausted sigh, “What, could we do?” He knew that he wouldn’t be able to justify his logic to the bot, but he had to try. “Yes, she hurt me, paralyzed me, but it’s, just not worth it.”

The bot jerked, “What, how? She-“

“Because no matter what we could do, even if we could try, it will never be as bad as what happened to me.” Gamzee blinked at the statement, surprised by the sudden firmness of his tone, but said nothing as he dropped his head on the boy’s shoulders, his eyes returning to that glow of indigo that the boy grew used too. Tavros blinked the tears threatening to fall away. He cried too much from this memory, he refuses to now. “All I could, do is move on. And, wish her well.”

The two remained silent for the rest of the evening, just holding each other in relative, comfortable silence, until the boy requested to go home. When he got there, Tavros quickly rolled through the house, before announcing that his father wasn’t there.

He then asked the bot to stay until his father got home.

“You’ll have to motherfucking detach me limb from motherfuckin’ limb to get me out.” Was the bot’s only reply before crawling in bed with the boy. Gamzee hugged the boy close, like a life line, and placed a small kiss on the boy’s head. Tavros blushed again, giggling a little bit, before falling asleep in the steambot’s soft indigo glow.

His father didn’t return home that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Victimized, bereaved, and disappointed at seemingly every turn, I still resist feeling defeated, or cynical. I have come to believe that anger and grudges are burning embers in the heart not worth carrying through life. The best response to those who wound me is to get away from them- and wish them well.”
> 
> \- “Wish Them Well”, Rush, Clockwork Angels.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bot and the boys first kiss.

_"Tav,"_

Tavros crossed his arms on the flat surface of Dirk's workbench, sighing heavily as the stoic engineer brought out his tools for repair. The boy's right hand loosely gripped Gamzee's left, as the said automaton laid across the bench, unresponsive. The boy didn't like seeing Gamzee like this, vulnerable and ineffective, but the bot preferred it, saying that sometimes the repairs hurt and that he trusts Dirk.

The boy idly wondered if the bot trusted him as much.

_"I know this is sudden- I didn't even find out about this until today."_

As Dirk gathered all the necessary equipment needed, the mohawked boy slumped his head down in his arms, exasperated. He let out a big sigh he didn't know he was holding.

_"But, unfortunately, I have to leave with the Calvary. There have been reports about pirates that we have to look into and I couldn't bail myself out"_

Tavros gripped the bot's hand tighter, as the engineer started to work on Gamzee's damaged right arm, mumbling under his breath. Something about the bot needing to be more careful. It didn't matter much.

_"I'll be back in a few days."_

The boy trembled slightly, pulling the unmoving hand toward himself.

That was a week ago.

Tavros got the message via courier bot when he was in the kitchen grabbing breakfast. The boy knew that something was wrong. His first clue being Gamzee's (welcomed) presence in his bed, and the clear absence of his own father. He just didn't expect it to be true when the courier came by.

Stalled near the kitchen cabinets, the boy remembers fumbling with the little clockwork recorder in his hand, hesitating to play it. When he did eventually play it, the boy's heart crumbled.

_"I'm sorry. I love you, kiddo."_

There was more to it, just some minor reminders about money and medication. It didn't matter. He held the transmission in his hand for a few moments before throwing it in a small fit of anger across the kitchen before the message even finished.

He wasn't mad at the sudden mission, he was mad at how he was informed about it.

It felt like he didn't even care.

From the corner of his eye, Tavros saw Gamzee come in almost a minute later, worry apparent in his glowing eyes. When the bot spotted the boy crestfallen, he immediately rushed to his side, comforting the best he could. But sadly, it wasn't enough.

The week went by slowly, only keeping himself busy through school and small chores. It was almost as if he fell back into the routine he was in when he first came to Skaia. Dawdling, tedious and painfully familiar.

Gamzee was there though, trying his hardest to cheer the boy up. It helped, to some degree, but the boy still gave a sad, almost hollow, smile. The bot knew it was fake, and the boy knew that the clown knew. It was like he wasn't even trying to hide it. The boy could not blame the automaton for trying though. It was in his nature to put people in high spirits. It probably hurt the clown bot that he was unable to make Tavros happy.

Today however, Gamzee did something different.

According to the timepiece sitting on the drawers of the boy's room, it was two hours past noon. Tavros sat, crossed-legged, against the headboard of his bed, with a study sheet in one of his hands in front of him (something about the history of the country, or the mechanics of a simple steambot, he wasn't really paying attention). Gamzee was sprawled across the bed in his normal lethargic fashion, with his head on the boy's lap, smearing his usual face paint all over. Tavros, of course, couldn't feel it, but he was aware, so with his free hand, he petted the bot's unruly hair. The copper clown seemed to enjoy it, making small purr like sounds (can bots really purr?) of contentment, and it made the boy a little less tense than normal.

Of course, the mohawked boy couldn't fully enjoy the moment himself, in light of recent circumstances. He wasn't really mad anymore at the sudden absence of his father, just somber. With four parts worry. He just misses him, more than he's cross. His lips pulled down slightly as he let his thoughts drift. It didn't take too long for the boy's head to be filled with ridiculous what-if scenarios concerning his father. And it didn't take long for the fear and guilt to settle in.

The boy sat the sheet down beside him. No use in trying to study something when his mind was elsewhere. As he was still absentmindedly petting the artificial strands of Gamzee's hair, Tavros tried to push the thoughts away, but they would rush their way back. He thought of the last time he saw his dad, at the barracks. How he was livid with another solider when they parted, hastily. He didn't want that to be his last interaction with him.

"I never got to say goodbye" Tavros whispered, hopefully out of Gamzee's earshot. If he was annoyed by the boy's constant complaining, he never said anything, but Tavros didn't want to burden the bot more than he already had.

Gamzee rose his head, though, indicating that yes, he heard that. But the response wasn't quite what Tavros expected.

Slowly, the bot slid up to sit from his lazy position. Carefully the copper clown turned to face the boy, using his right arm as leverage against the end table next to the bed. Using his free hand, Gamzee pulled Tavros' head down to kiss the boy's forehead, like it was the most normal thing to do (and to the bot, it almost was).

" 'Never say goodbye, because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting.'" Was all the bot said before he smiled widely at the mohawked boy.

Tavros blinked. Gamzee just quoted his favorite book to him. Before he could even process the action, the boy smiled his first real smile in days, blushing all the while. Gamzee beamed right back. A few moments of comforting silence passed before the automaton's gaze softened and looked to Tavros as if asking permission for something, pleading even. The paraplegic shivered under the stare, before letting his own drop, holding up a hand to the one still held on his head. That seemed to be the answer the bot was looking for before leaning in. The boy closed his eyes

Whatever the boy was expecting never came. Instead, he heard a crash of metal and a loud curse. Tavros shot his eyes open and darted to the source of the sound. Sure enough there was Gamzee, on the floor, his right arm limp against his body. He started laughing out loud, like the tension in the room moments ago never existed.

Against Tavros' better judgment, he laughed along side him before ushering him to Dirk's.

Dirk snapped his fingers in front of the boy, causing him to jerk out of his thoughts and wheel back some. The blonde was still as stoic as ever as he straitened up behind the workspace.

"You spaced out, kid," he said, before propping Gamzee back into a sitting position. Tavros couldn't see it behind those obnoxious glasses of his, but he could tell the engineer's gaze bore straight at the boy. "He's fixed," he deadpanned before flipping the steambot's power switch.

Tavros only saw Gamzee power up once before, and that was under different circumstances, but watching the bot come to life before him, his gears speeding up, the steam whistling from his body, the brightening indigo forming in his eyes, it was beautiful. Tavros tightened his hold on the clown's hand, watching as the bot's head slowly turn toward the boy. Those eyes brightened completely and Gamzee smiled, returning his hold and gave a tight squeeze on the mohawked boy's hand.

They decided to stick around Dirk's a little while longer, much to the blonde's displeasure. There wasn't too much to do, other than mess with the engineer's inventions and watch him work on a current project. Both became banned pretty quickly after a few things 'accidentally' broke (by Gamzee's hand). They both found a better activity when one of Dirk's own steam bots, Squarewave came in. Tavros remembered quickly that he was the bot he saw the first day he was here. The three of them had a 'slam-off', which was just them throwing rhymes at one another. It ended up being a three way tie. When Dirk's other bot, Sawtooth, made his way to the trio, he demolished them. And that was sugarcoating it. The tall bot didn't lord his win over the other three, just told them to try harder, before taking off with the smaller bot running after him like a puppy.

It ended up being pretty late at night when Tavros and Gamzee finally got kicked out of the blonde's workshop. They threw rhymes at each other ("Daaamn, Tavbro! I didn't know you could throw down sick fires like that! My motherfuckin' gears can't up and handle the heat!") as they made their way back to the boy's empty house.

Tavros started yawning as Gamzee opened his front door. Wheeling inside, the boy made a straight beeline toward his room. As he got to his bed, he spared the automaton behind him a glance before pulling himself up. Gamzee, with his trademark smile ever in place, automatically followed the mohawked boy and took the space in front of him. The boy was starting to get tired, but he could tell that the bot wanted to entertain him a little more, so Tavros leaned against the headboard, sitting.

"Hey, bro? Can I ask you something?" The bot asked, all too sudden, but the boy expected it, in a sense.

"Of course, Gam," Tavros replied, with a smile matching the automaton's.

Gamzee's own smile faltered slightly, though, before his artificial eyes met the boy's, "Can I motherfuckin' kiss you?" His tone was nervous, but pleading. Almost like a child asking his parents for sweets before dinner.

The boy blinked before blushing deeply. His mind went blank and his mouth went dry. He never expected that. His throat formed a lump and his heart sped up faster. But despite it all, he wasn't repulsed by the idea. The boy actually liked it. Blushing to the point where his head might explode, without really knowing that he did it, the boy nodded.

"Miracles," the bot murmured, the flinch now nonexistent.

Tavros expects a lot of things from Gamzee, from his jokes, to his juggling to even his large contagious smiles. His mind, however, drew a blank as to what he could be expecting at this moment. The moment where Gamzee is cupping his face with his copper fingers, where those shining indigo eyes glow with something other than their usual mirth, where he's leaning in and when the boy closes his eyes. But when the bot's painted lips found their way to the boy's for the first time, slow, loving, tender and sweet, all expectations flew out the window.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Never say goodbye, because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting._ \- Peter Pan
> 
> \---  
> Good news is that this is caught up with the rest of the internet.
> 
> Bad news is you got this the day PBJ sunk.
> 
> *cracks open a bottle of PBJ Vodka and raises the bottle


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The bot's emotions for the boy, and a friend voices his thoughts.

Gamzee sees his emotions through colors.

It's hard to explain to others who don't see the mIrAcUlOuS motherfuckin' world the way the bot does. Of course he couldn't up and see them, it was all his heart-gear putting stuff in his think pan. All he knows is that the more he likes someone, the color brightens. Normally, it's like a neutral pink, not bright, not outstanding, just enough to know that Gamzee likes them. The highest he's ever felt was a pale red, which was reserved for the Old Man, followed by a bright pink, which had up and settled itself on Dirk-bro and Karbro. The lowest was a fucking pitch black, which landed on the blonde engineer's motherfucking little brother, and thinking about that makes his gears up and hiss.

Gamzee didn't ever think that anyone could surpass the red for his creator. Of course, he also didn't expect to meet his Tavbro.

At first, he was pink like everyone else, but that didn't matter, it wasn't the bitchtit's colors that made the bot interested in him, it was mere impulse. Although the bot would be lying if the colors didn't brighten every time the chocolate-haired boy would show for his mIrAcLeS, or when he saved him, or when they first hugged. It wasn't too long, about when he started showing up at Tav's window, for the color to hit the same shade as Dirk-bro's and Karbro's.

Those mIrAcUlOuS colors grew brighter when the boy read to the clown in his own home, quickly growing into the same motherfucking shade as the Old Man. The steambot didn't know at first if that was a good thing, but he couldn't help but peck his chocolate boy's forehead when he climbed into his bed- his very own creator used to do that. And it felt right doing the same for Tav.

When Tavbro started to share his dreams and mIrAcLeS to the bot, they grew again, surpassing the red for the Old Man. He found that it wasn't a bad thing after. When the boy asked the bot to stay with him in is bed that night, after unloading his tale, his burden, that motherfucking UNMIRACULOUS BITCH, and his pain onto the clown, the red shined off him brighter than the motherfucking sun.

MiRaClEs.

\-----

The week his Tavbro had to go without his parental figure was rough.

All the red feels the bot had in the world couldn't help him feel better. He'd tried all his mIrAcLeS, everything from stories to mindless magic tricks. They didn't do much, other than earn the bot a hollow smile. And Gamzee hated that fucking smile. A smile like his should be up and full of colors and unbridled motherfucking happiness and mIrAcLeS, not PAIN and fucking EMPTINESS.

The bot's very own smile felt that way for years.

He KNOWS what it's like.

The fucking PAIN of his guardian leaving. The searing, piercing, TORTUROUS pain that seeps into Gamzee's core like a fucking parasite, digging, LEECHING all the mIrAcLeS the bot had in this fucking world, until there was nothing. Nothing but a dull, hollow ache in the clown's hollow copper chest.

There was a difference however. Between Tavbro's and the bot's pain. Tavros' old man is at least coming back, the bot's is six feet under a fucking rock.

So Gamzee kept to the chocolate boy's side like a shadow, making sure those nasty feels stay the fuck away from his Tavbro. No matter the motherfuck what. Sadly, all his attempts ended in vain. So he just stood there, just like a motherfucking shadow, hoping to calm the boy's mind at least.

All he wanted, though, was a small smile.

Nearly a week later, the bot up and managed to get one.

That little motherfucking quote. He should've done it earlier. Of all the little things he did for the mohawked boy, a small quote from a motherfucking fairy tale was the one thing that worked mIrAcLeS on his Tavbro, bringing him to a full smile that could have blinded Skaia with all its mirth. It made the automaton's heart gear whirl faster in his chest and the red feels go crazy.

Which might be why the bot started to lean forward, fueled by impulse and red feels, hoping to catch those smiling mIrAcUlOuS lips in a real kiss he's seen lovers share.

He didn't expect his arm to give way and ruin his motherfucking moment.

Gamzee's second attempt, though, worked out better than he had ever prayed.

The boy's lips on the bot's felt like a mIrAcLe. His entire motherfucking body nearly shook with how hard his heart gear was going, and every bit of feels the clown had intensified. They were still though, the automaton honestly had no idea what to do, and Tavbro was all tensed up. Noticing the boy's stiffness, Gamzee was about to pull way, fear starting to creep into his copper core. He almost pulled away entirely until he felt trembling, timid fingers comb through his black locks and pull him back.

Tavros started to glide those beautiful lips against his, the small remains of the bot's face paint helping the boy slide against his copper lips. The automaton honked, momentarily shocked at his sudden eagerness, but soon relaxed as he started to copy the boy's movements. Tav groaned into his mouth and Gamzee's gears span ten times faster; the hand that was on the boy's beautiful mIrAcUlOuS face slid back to his brown arch of hair and pulled him closer to the automaton. They kept this pace for a while, until Gamzee felt his Tavbro break the kiss, presumably for air (which the bot now has a slight motherfucking hatred for).

Gamzee pressed his forehead against tavros', slightly opening his optics. He was met with the sight of his Tavbro, his face a bright red, his beautiful chocolate eyes glossed over and swirled with so much emotion, and his lips, kiss-bruised and slightly plumped, curled into a smile that made Gamzee's heart gear nearly stop. The automaton gave his chocolate boy a smile of his own, followed by a small honking laugh, which Tav happily joined in on.

No words were said between them. No words were needed.

It didn't take him long to dive back onto the steambot's lips, this time accompanied with a warm wet appendage sliding across the automaton's bottom lip. Gamzee automatically opened his mouth, letting the warm muscle invade his lips. The clown doesn't have a tongue of his own, so he simply played with Tav's in his lips and sucked at it, eliciting a guttural groan from the boy.

If the bot could taste anything, he would bet that Tavros would taste like motherfucking chocolate.

\------

"You kissed him." It wasn't a question. It was a statement, made by one motherfucker, Karkat Vantas.

Gamzee nodded anyway, oblivious to the growing anger of his friend.

"You fucking _kissed_ him." The dark-haired man heavily emphasized on 'kissed'.

"Yeah, but bro-" Gamzee tried to explain himself to his pale friend, but whatever was about to come from the bot's mouth got cut off by the shorter raven.

"You don't just fucking kiss someone out of nowhere, you rusted piece of fucking scrap metal!" Karkat scowled, flailing his arms above him in frustration. Karbro's this crabby motherfucker that comes in the bot's workshop once in a while, since he was a kid actually, to 'get the hell away from those fucking nutjobs I call a family'. Mostly all he does is just plop down on the clown's couch and rant for hours on end until his just-as-talkative twin brother, or his boyfriend Sollux, or something, comes to retrieve him.

He also has a thing for romance. Not a small, 'just a few romance novels here and there,' thing either. It's as big as his anger. Which is pretty fucking big. That's why Gamzee thought it would be a good idea to up and tell him about the mIrAcUlOuS kiss with Tav.

Turns out, not the best motherfucking idea.

"Palebro," the bot started, turning to his friend and papping him on the head. The raven scowled, he hated that nickname. He thinks it's a crack at his less-than-normal complexion. Couldn't be farther from the motherfucking truth. "It wasn't outta motherfuckin' nowhere. I up and asked him, and motherfucker said okay!" Gamzee defended.

Kar looked at the automaton like he just turned human in front of him, before returning to the normal motherfucking scowl he likely sports daily. "Then he's just as messed up as you," he sneered, but the bot knew the phrase held no malice.

Instead, Gamzee gave one of his trademark grins and up and poked a copper finger at his pale friend on the cheek, earning a growl from Karkat as he squirmed on the couch. "But palebro, isn't that what up and happened with your first motherfuckin' kiss with Solbro?"

The raven's eyes widened as he turned to growl at the clown, the blush on his face in great contrast to his pale skin, "Fuck you, that's not true!" he yelled almost too defensively. The bot laughed, the incident in question clear in his think pan as the day it motherfucking happened.

"Really, bro?" The steambot quirked condescendingly, "That's not how I up and remember it." Ignoring the warning growls emitting from Karkat, Gamzee continued, sitting back on the couch next to his friend, "if I up and motherfuckin' remember correctly, you were here, on this motherfuckin' couch…"

"Gamzee. Don't you. Fucking. Dare."

The copper clown ignored him. "You were up and sulkin' here, about 'the one' going off and gettin' motherfuckin' engaged to some rich sis."

"The fucking _heiress_ , ass. And I wasn't sulking!"

"Was too, palebro," Gamzee playfully poked him again. "Up until Solbro came here and you got very angry then."

"Gamzee, I swear to gog if you don't shut up I will slice out your voice box with my sickles." Those abnormal eyes of his narrowed in warning at the clown, but he knew they were nothing more than empty threats. The bot laughed.

"After a few minutes of fighting about what-motherfuckin'-ever, you planted a big one," the automaton grinned tenfold as he up and prodded the side of Kar's head again. "Right on," poke, "the," another poke, "motherfuckin' lips."

Karkat rolled his eyes at him and groaned before pushing the bot off the couch, Gamzee laughing all the way down. "At least we're fucking human! Not a steambot like you!" He shouted before he could catch himself.

Gamzee stopped, his grin faltering. Owch. That hurt more than it should.

He was right, though.

Karkat caught his mistake as soon as he saw the smile disappear. Quickly he moved to the bot's side, aiming to pap him on the head, to cheer him up and apologize. Gamzee's head shot up, optics glaring at him before Karkat could get halfway. "Don't be up and puttin' them bad motherfuckin' vibes up all over the miracles, Karbro." He said, stern, far from his usual mirth or chirpiness. No laugh, no chuckle, not even a damn grin. His optics glowed a dark, heavy violet. Not yet red, but dangerously waxing toward it.

Karbro shivered. He's seen this before, a while back. He just absconded the fuck out of there and ran off to get Dirkbro. Kar was just about to do the same exact thing, eyeing all the exits in the room, but the simultaneous rings of the clocks chiming throughout the workshop stopped the raven, scaring him, before he could even budge.

Gamzee, however, jerked his head forward a bit before the ever present grin returned to his face and his optics returned to their normal shade of indigo. He laughed as the final echoes of ringing lingered. "Oh! Time for this motherfucker to head on up to that motherfuckin' water place!" He chirped, his cheerful demeanor returning as if the bot never had the sudden mood swing. The automaton stood up and languidly strode toward the door. "Best friend can stay here as long as he wants to while I go perform my mIrAcLeS, and see my Tavvy." The bot honked as he made his way out, leaving a very confused Karbro behind.

\----

Halfway through Gamzee's second performance he spotted his lovely chocolate boy in the afternoon crowd, a smile on his face just for the bot and a light blush dusting his tan features. The clown almost messed up with all the squirmy red feels building up in his chest, but quickly redeemed himself, his smile almost splitting his face in two. Only the best for his Tavbro.

When the doves were released and the show was deemed finished, the bot ran to him and gave his boy a big hug, strong enough to motherfucking lift him from the seat. And he hugged back just as motherfucking enthusiastically, giggling in time with the clown's honking laughter.

MiRaClEs.

(you will REGRET THIS)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oop. Threw in mentioned SolKat.
> 
> I realized that I was 8 chapters into a GamTav fic with no sign of Karkles. Had to change that.
> 
> Fuck canon.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy meets the bots friend, and the boy gets distressing news.

Tavros licked his lips for what seemed like the hundredth time that afternoon. He's been doing this every five minutes in his classes, not paying attention to the instructor giving his drawled out theory on steam pressurization, or the detailed diagrams of the first mass produced labor steam bots in Skaia. No, he just sat there, eyes forward to the boards, swiping his tongue across his lips. To anyone else, he may have looked like a creep, lusting after the instructors with dazed eyes, but no. Far from the truth. He was lusting after something else entirely.

Alright, 'lusting' might not be the right term, more like reminiscing. Reminiscing about the bot whose copper lips fit so perfectly over his own like a puzzle. How the boy would tug at his hair to bring him closer. How his lips felt so warm, despite being made of metal. How he suckled around Tavros' tongue like a child with a lollipop, making him groan helplessly for the bot. The mohawked boy licked his lips again, a tingle shooting up his spine. It wasn't Tavros' first kiss (another little pleasantry taken by one miss Vriska Serket in the boy's youth), but it was undoubtedly his best. Afterwards, he held the boy in his arms, gently kissing his forehead, cheeks, eyelids, anywhere the copper bot could reach, while whispering small things about colors in Tavros' ears as he drifts to sleep. Blushing, the boy turned his thoughts to the bot who's been at the center of it all.

Gamzee.

Tavros smiled. To be honest, he never thought to ever have any romantic feelings toward the steam clown. It was a mostly platonic deal, he thought. But by the way the boy was kissing back, feverishly, passionately, clinging to Gamzee like he was his only lifeline- it certainly made the mohawked boy think a little more. Especially about his emotions. His gut-wrenching, confusing, intense string of emotions. It all scares him, but thrills him at the same time.

A thought crosses him; maybe Gamzee just did that to make him feel better. To keep his mind off his still-absent father. But the way the bot looked at him, like he would rip out his own heart, or whatever he has as a substitute, and give it to Tavros, smiling.

Tavros groaned as his forehead made contact with the cool wood of his desk. Taboo relations with steam bots are hard. It's hard and no one understands.

"Mister Nitram!"

The boy pales and heat rose to his face as he sits up. "Y-yes, sir?"

"Is there anything you'd like to add?" All eyes were on Tavros as the instructor pointed to the blackboards in front of the class.

"No, uhm, sir." He blanched.

"Then let me continue my lesson without your commentary, mister Nitram." He called out as he turned back to the board. Humiliated, Tavros dug his face into his arms, blushing heavily, as he half-listened to the teacher while he drags on about Ether, and its proper uses in steam bots and certain weaponry.

Tavros licked his lips again, a few moments after, and the cycle restarted.

\---

Meeting Gamzee at the square always brightens Tavros' day, even in the middle of the emotional warfare taking place. Rolling up to the front of the crowd, he took one good look at the bot before blushing, the memories from last night running in his head in full force, again, and whatever conflicted emotions the boy had disappeared, replaced with contentment. Gamzee catches the boy's gaze and his normal grin grows wider against his painted face. He fumbles, the boy notices, but is otherwise immaculate in his performance. When the doves are released, he notices one of the birds sporting a chocolate brown ribbon around it's neck, rather than the normal purple. Tavros blushes slightly at the insinuation and the small, familiar butterflies flutter in his stomach.

As the crowd dispersed, Gamzee took no time in embracing the boy with his odd honking laughter, lifting him from his chair. Tavros giggles alongside him, wrapping his arms around the bot's neck, completely used to his strong hugs. A few passersby rose a brow at the scene, but the two paid no mind to the world surrounding them. The hug lasted longer then usual, but neither questioned it. It just seemed right. When Gamzee finally lowered the mohawked boy down to his chair, the bot smiled cheerfully, glancing to his left, his right, then stealing a quick peck from the boy's lips. Upon seeing Tavros' blushing face, the clown sports a grin like he's just won the biggest prize in all of Skaia. Before the boy could comment, the copper bot took his place behind Tavros' chair, pushing him forward to wherever Gamzee wanted to take him.

"I want ya to up and meet a motherfuckin' friend of mine," He commented, taking a turn leading to his shop, "Dunno if the brother's still there or not, but it's motherfuckin' worth a shot." The bot shrugged, before leaning down to nuzzle the shaven sides of Tavros' hair. A spontaneous move that made the boy shiver in his chair.

Wait, friend? Tavros didn't know the copper clown knew anyone outside Dirk. "Who, is it, Gamz?" Tavros inquired, fighting past the shudders the bot's inducing. Does Gamzee know what he does to the poor boy? Probably so, if the almost mischievous grin on his face is any indication on the matter.

Gamzee answers confidently in an uncoordinated mess of words containing 'Karbro', 'Best friend' and 'Palebro' thrown in at times (the 'best friend' comment made Tavros' stomach drop, if it was jealousy or not, he wasn't sure). A few moments of Gamzee's random babble (with the mohawked boy chiming in when it seemed right), the duo steadily reached the shop and Tavros wringed his hands on his lap, a wave of nervousness drowning him. Gamzee didn't outright see the anxiety, but he could feel the tension radiate from the boy. The bot hugged him from the side, before going to the entrance. It didn't help.

Opening the door, Gamzee, in his usual cheerful demeanor, calls out into the shop. After hearing an angry reply from inside, the bot perks up and merrily wheels the boy inside.

And Tavros' hands are shaking now and he looks down at his lap. Social awkwardness at its best.

"Palebro!" The bot's jovial tone rang through the shop. Hearing the echo run through him made the boy shudder.

"Call me that again, asshole, and I'll dump your metal frame in the lake and watch it spark." Was the less than pleasant response.

Whatever Tavros was expecting, it wasn't that. Gamzee laughed as he wheeled the boy in further and Tavros took a chance to look up to the source of the threat.

Tavros had to blink, however. The voice does not match the owner in the slightest. 'Palebro''s short- the boy could tell even being in a wheelchair, his hair is black and unruly, pale like he's never set a foot outside, and held crimson eyes that nearly made Tavros wheel back if Gamzee wasn't already there. The raven's face is set to an intimidating scowl as he leans back against one of the worktables behind him, crosses his arms, and runs his ruby color gaze through the boy, apprising him, almost.

If it wasn't for the blood-colored eyes holding enough fury to power a whole army of steambot soldiers, Tavros could almost say he looked like a mad puppy.

"This him?" the stranger grunts out, looking up at the bot.

"Sure is bro!" Gamzee placed a hand in the boy's small arch of hair, tousling it, while using his free arm to snake around the boy's shoulders. "This mIrAcUlOuS motherfucker here is Tavbro." He informed in his usual mirthful tone, like everybody in Skaia should be aware of this fact.

Tavros finally found his voice as he flinched away from Gamzee's constricted hold. "I-it's, Tavros," the mohawked boy corrected, as the bot tightened his hold around him.

The pale raven scoffs before eyeing back at Tavros. "Karkat fucking-Vantas. Pleasure to meet your fucking ass." He shouts out and wow, rude. Tavros was about to reply before Karkat glared daggers back at Gamzee. "You couldn't wait to sodomize the kid behind closed doors?"

Tavros blushes. Hard.

Karkat sees this and points to the boys lips and hair. After fumbling around the clown's hold, the boy felt around, and sure enough, when he pulled back, greasepaint stained his fingers, as well as his lips and parts of his hair. Letting out a very manly yelp, Tavros tries to wipe off the paint with his shirt, while still struggling with Gamzee, who only chuckled, tightened his grasp, and nuzzled the boy underneath him, earning another squeak from Tavros.

"Just up and showing a motherfucker the love." The clown replied with a small smile. Of course.

Karkat rolled his eyes. "Well stop it. It looks like the kid is suffocating." He remarked before straightening up and moving to the couch, leaving the affectionate bot and very confused boy to their devices.

\---

Tavros learned as much about Karkat as he knows about engineering- next to nothing. He spent ten minutes in the main room in his wheelchair in front of the couch with Gamzee on his lap fussing with Tavros' hair while the clown told numerous stories about Karkat in his youth, said raven spitting out threats like poison. The stories were entertaining, but they lead to no true facts about the paler man. So in a bout of awkward fidgeting, he rolled off with Gamzee when the bot announced that he needed to feed his birds. Karkat almost looked relieved to see them go.

"Don't worry 'bout Karbro." He informs, opening the cage to his beloved doves. "'Motherfucker gets used to his loud noise," he leans down to catch a quick kiss on the corner of the boy's mouth, who didn't flinch from the contact this time. Gamzee chuckles as Tavros tries to wipe off the excess face paint.

"Well, I don't know if, I can get used to it, yet. Or, any time soon." The boy stammers out, giggling alongside the bot. Gamzee flashes one of his large grins at the mohawked boy before the bot turns to the pin and starts cooing at the birds in front of them. Tavros giggles again at the sight. It's really an odd spectacle; Gamzee, the usually lax steambot who loves performing in front of various crowds, focused and attentive over the care of birds. The boy gets why- the doves are a big part of his act. But he figured it was more then that. He feeds, cleans and interacts with every bird individually, a task Tavros doesn't even have patience for. When the boy asked the bot about this, Gamzee only shrugged and mumbled out "motherfuckin' habit". The way he answered, sullen and distant, scared the boy, so he promptly dropped the subject.

Gamzee closes the cage momentarily, mumbling to the doves about their food, before grabbing the bird seed at the side of the cage. Or at least tries to. The moment he lifts the bag from the ground, the bottom splits, spilling the remaining contents all over the dirty land.

"Motherfuck." The bot crouched over the mess, investigating to see if the seed is in any way salvageable. Tavros covers his mouth trying his best not to laugh. Gamzee spares the boy a glance before chuckling alongside him. "Well, Tavbro," he straightens up, brushing the dirt off his pants, "If you motherfuckin' think this is all funny and shit, you can up and get me more motherfuckin' feed." The bot walks over to the boy and leans in to place a small, lingering kiss on the boys lips. The simple lip-lock lasted no longer than a minute, but it left the boy breathless nonetheless. Pulling away, the clowns lips quirked. "It's near the motherfuckin' front."

Tavros could swear that Gamzee was a little evil.

Gathering his bearings, Tavros nodded, panting in shallow breaths. "O-okay, Gamz…" Gamzee winked at the boy before turning back to the cage and there's the butterflies again. Taking a deep breath, the boy makes the trek inside, wheeling through the back door and bracing himself for the inevitable run-in with Karkat inside.

_"KK, I don't like thith. And I know you don't either. But for fuckth thake I have to."_

Tavros stopped dead at the sound of a new voice. He rolled back, hiding beside the bookcase. The boy leaned forward a bit, wanting to see what was going on. He noticed Karkat sitting on the far side of the couch, cradling a brass clockwork recorder in his hands, similar to the one that was given to Tavros from his father earlier that week.

_"I would rather be in bed. With you, perhapth. But according to them, I'm the 'best helmthmen in the fleet'. In other wordth, thit crathes to fuck if I'm not there. My dad and Mituna'll be there, tho it won't be total hell."_

Karkat rubbed his eyes with his sleeve and mumbled out a 'fuckass'. Tavros blinked in realization over the transmission.

_"I'll be home thafe. When we kick the gog out of those pirateth, we'll come home to a big party and you'll be there with tearth in your eyeth and we'll argue at each other like I never left."_

The voice on the other end of the recorder chuckled and the raven snuffed.

_"I love you, K-Karkat."_

The message cuts dead after that and Karkat breathes, restraining himself from bursting into tears. "I love you too.." he breathes out into the empty air, like whoever it was on the other side could hear him.  
Tavros had to shake himself back to reality. He feels sorry for Karkat, though he knows all too well that pity is the last thing he would want. But now he's faced with a dilemma. If he just rolls in there, Karkat's going to know he listened in on a moment where he's vulnerable. Maybe if he's quiet he can sneak back toward the back yard…

Or lose his handling and crash into the bookcase. Smooth.

"Who the fuck is there?" The shout sounded more irritated than angry, but Tavros knew its source. Craning his head over his mess, he saw Karkat glaring at him like he could burn the boy with his stare. The gaze didn't hold as much anger as it did when they first met minutes ago, but it was enough to scare Tavros to death.

Bracing himself for the barrage of angry threats, Tavros wheeled forward, trembling with nervousness. "I-it's just, um, me…" The boy weakly mumbled as he came to view. Karkat eyed him for a moment before shaking his head and grunting out some rude invective, then lowered his head back to the device, shuffling it around in his hands. The mohawked boy blinked at the lack of screaming curses before rolling over to the front and searching for his objective. Spotting the feed near the door, he dragged it to his lap, making his way toward the back once more, maneuvering around all the worktables and other litter.

Before he left out the back, he glanced back at the pale raven, who was exactly as Tavros left him; slouched over with a copper recording device in his hands, glaring at it through distant eyes.

"B-Batterwitch? Or, Condesce?" The names of the two steam fliers that left earlier that week. The question left Tavros' lips before he could stop himself.

Karkat rose his head to meet Tavros, before raising a brow at him, confused, before the inquiry clicked. "…Condesce." Was the raven's only answer. The boy nodded.

"My, dad's… On the Condesce, too." Was Tavros' only reply. Figuring that was all he could really say, the boy left, meeting the bot out back.

Tavros found Gamzee right where he left him, by the bird pin, mumbling praises at his doves. Gamzee was too distracted with the feathered creatures to notice the boy wheel next to him, his smile slowly coming back. The steambot finally noticed him and turned the boy's way when he reached the bot's side, the smile on his copper lips matching Tavros'.

" 'Bout time, Tavbro. You up and got lost in there, my adorable motherfucker?" That was one way to greet him. Swooping in for one quick peck on the boy's lips, the bot takes the bag from his lap and shakes it, satisfied.

"No, I ran into, Karkat," Tavros shrugged, not thinking if the clown could see it.

"Oh?" The boy cold of sworn the indigo glow in Gamzee's eyes sparked with mischief.

Tavros blinked. The evil bot.

Gamzee chuckled before opening the bag and filling the bowls in the cages with the bird seeds. Smiling, the bot handed the bag to Tavros. "Wanna help, Tavbro?" The boy giggled, accepting the offer almost immediately. The duo laughed as they both played around the cages, throwing the feed at one another, overfilling the bowls, Gamzee eating some himself (as a dare made from the boy), the two hardly noticed when a certain pale raven decided to crash their fun.

"GAMZEE! CRIPPLE!" Owch. Rude. "What the hell are you doing? The whole neighborhood could hear you! And Gamzee! Stop overfilling the damned bowls! And stop eating the fucking seeds!" Karkat looked silly, flailing his arms about in a fit.

Gamzee lethargically explained his actions: his birds deserve the extra treat, he was checking to see if it wasn't poisoned, and Karkat just spewed out more threats of violence, adding Tavros to the mix too ("You fucking encouraged him."). The yard was so rowdy with commotion, that the boy and the bot didn't notice the front door slamming shut.

That is until a new face frantically joined the three.

"Karkat!"

The said raven freezes on the spot as the mohawked boy and clown bot turns to the intruder. He looked suspiciously like Karkat, except his hair is neater (if not also a bit tussled), his posture is straighter and refined, and he wears an obnoxiously bright red sweater (Seriously? It's nearing the summer months), and a simple purple timepiece hanging off his hip. He's also out of breath, breathing in deeply for a moment before calling out again, "Karkat."

Karkat regained his movements and turned to meet the new person, "Gog fucking Kankri! You managed to hop off that noble's dick long enough to retrieve me? Too bad, I'm not going."

Gamzee leans down and whispers in Tavros' ear, "Kankri. Karbro's motherfuckin' twin bro." Tavros nods in confirmation.

"Karkat!" Kankri's voice was laced with offence as he straightens himself. "Normally I would warn you about your disproportionate use of expletives, but now is not the time, for there is an issue that needs your urgent presence." He almost shouted in a rush. Karkat groaned, rolling his eyes.

"Really now?" The louder twin scoffed, sounding almost condescending. "What could be so fucking important for you to-"

"The Condesce has returned!" The other twin interrupted. Karkat stiffened, and Tavros' head perked. Kankri coughed and continued, "I-I apologize for interrupting, Karkat, but as I stated-"

"They're back?" Karkat sounded in disbelief. Tavros practically started to jump in his chair in glee, if Gamzee hadn't placed a hand on his shoulder and chest to clam him down. The twin glanced behind Kankri, as if he was waiting for someone to appear. "Is he here? Where the fuck is Sollux?" The raven nearly pleaded.

"Interrupting is rude, Karkat. And yes, Cronus informed me of their return nearly an hour ago." He informed, before taking in a deep breath, preparing himself, presumably, "And there is a problem."

Karkat paused and Tavros stopped squirming. The angry twin took a step forward, "Spit it out." Those words were drawn out slowly and dripping with venom. Kankri visibly shivered before continuing.

"Pirates have ambushed them near one of the Checkpoints near one of the other major cities." Kankri paused, thinking about his next few words carefully. "The surprise attack resulted in the total destruction of the Batterwitch, nearly taking most of its crew with it." Another pause. Tavros starts to squirm again, this time in discomfort. Gamzee kneels down to his level and tried to hold him close, despite the wheelchair obstructing the action. Karkat growls.

"What. About. Sollux." That wasn't a question.

"I was getting to that. The Consesce took heavy fire, but managed to escape the fight with little more than half its crew still intact. The Captors…" The neater twin tried to avoid the pure venom pouring from his brother's gaze and spoke once more. "Their father is dead. Mituna…" Kankri took a deep breath in, composing himself, "has suffered severe brain damage. As for Sollux…" Karkat started to shake. "He's been rendered blind."

Karkat bolted. The raven ran past his brother, not caring what happens, not caring where he is, not caring that he has no idea where to go. Tavros watched as he ran straight out the yard in total disbelief. But the boy was stuck in his own thoughts.

What of his own father?

Kankri turned to face the other two, a sad gaze fixing on them. "I apologize for this incident. Gamzee and… Sir." He nodded in Tav's direction before setting off, presumably after his brother.

Tavros took in one of the bot's hands, squeezing it, trying to calm himself down. He glimpsed at the bot, indigo meeting bronze, hoping he could read the boy without having to verbalize himself. He can't seem to find his voice. Luckily, Gamzee squeezed back, lifting himself and taking his place at the handlebars, "I'll take you motherfuckin' home."

The boy wished he went faster. He's squirming in his seat, impatiently, every step the bot making behind him louder than the next. After an eternity, the boy reached his home. He found it as empty as the hour he left it. Gamzee stood by his side, silently like a shadow, staying close to the boy.

They waited.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy cries, the bot is the rock.

It's raining. 

It's one of the most clichéd settings done in any way, shape or form, branding itself as symbolism. When the hero separates from their loved ones, rain surrounds them like a shroud. When a great evil triumphs over good, leaving the hero bruised and battered, it rains, thunders too, if one feels dramatic. When war wages across lands far away, it rains like shrapnel across the battlefield. 

When death makes his presence known, from behind him it rains like tears. 

The rain makes itself known across Skaia, pounding against the concrete, the doors, the windows, vibrating across the monochrome industrial city with no signs of stopping. Inside the grand church, the rain echoes through the corridors, accenting the preachers bellowing sermons promising paradise and eternal happiness for those lost. In the back, the boy wrings his hand across his lap, phasing out the preacher at the front in favor of the grueling storm outside, his eyes glued to the ground. 

Tavros weakly wonders if Gamzee brought in his doves from this rain. 

The thought quickly vanished when the preacher started to list the names of the departed, of the soldiers who fought for the city, their city. Tears sting at his eyes, like they have been for the past two days, but he refuses to cry. He has to be strong. For his dad. 

He's watching. 

Karkat sits next to him in this daunting cathedral, and for that he's glad. Even if he isn't here technically for Tavros. Just like the mohawked boy, the pale raven is completely uninterested in the pastor at the front, instead putting most of his attention to another black-haired man next to him. Judging by the bandages cross his eyes, the boy assumes that he's Sollux, though he didn't ask. 

The grueling list carries on, accompanied by the wailing cries, the shrieks of denial, and the lament of the friends, family and comrades packed in the house of worship. When the list hit the C's, Tavros hears a sharp intake of breath and a choked sob next to him. When the boy turns slightly, he sees the blind man hunched over, with Karkat leaning to comfort him. If Tavros hadn't seen him with the recorder the other day, he wouldn't have believed the scene. 

"He wath an ath," he chokes out to his partner, shaking, "but he wath my _father_." 

Tavros could relate.   
Karkat harshly whispers something incomprehensible next to him, possibly soothing, while Sollux trembles violently. 

Tavros would feel sorry for him, if he wasn't already feeling so empty. 

They stay like that for the next few minutes as more meaningless names came and went and the boy cringes whenever a particular loud cry echoed through out the corridor. He wishes Gamzee were here. He could hold him, whisper nice things to him, like Karkat is doing for his partner. The bot's done that for the last couple of days, while the boy just laid there, unmoving, unresponsive to everything except the clown. He opted for the bot to stay behind at his place, not too thrilled about seeing the reactions to a jovial steambot present in a large funeral. Right now, the boy regrets the decision. 

More time passes, and Tavros grows more and more anxious, elevating between the rain and the pastor as he reads in a booming, if not monotone voice. It almost reminds the boy of roll call during class. The N's came, and the handicapped boy fidgets, palling and nearly on the verge of vomiting. 

"…Rufio Nitram, "The Summoner"…" 

There it is. The name he dreaded hearing the moment he rolled into the holy house. Tavros knew he was dead; the message came to him the morning after the Condesce landed. But hearing this from a preacher who probably doesn't care all too much about any of this puts the nail through his chest. He doubles over, trembling, dry sobs releasing themselves from his throat before he could stop them. But no tears fall. They still sting at his eyes and cloud his vision, but he refuses to shed tears. Tavros feels a palm on his back rubbing in a comforting motion and he realizes it's Karkat. The boy doesn't want that hand. He wants Gamzee's. He wants the bot in general. 

He remembers the last time he saw his father. He was giving Tavros a tour of the barracks more then a week ago and he parted ways with the boy, furious about something involving another soldier. Another heavy tremor racks through him. His last moments with his own father, and the man barely gave him a proper farewell. Next day he got the message of him leaving with the Calvary. All this happened little over a week ago, yet it still felt like yesterday. 

The rest of the service blurred. He couldn't tell what happened beyond that point. Who talked, what they spoke, what happened, or any of that. All the boy could focus on was his trembling hands seated on his lap, and the strong pitter-patter of the rain outside. After what seemed to be forever, the clock tower bells toll with the new hour, and the wake finally ended, the people leaving the large church with misery and sorrow following them. 

Tavros took a deep breath before feeling another hand clasp his shoulder. Looking up, he sees Karkat, with Sollux behind him, clutching his hand in a death grip, giving him a sympathetic look, like the raven knows how he feels. He doesn't, the boy thinks, but he doesn't say anything. In a sense, he did lose something, but it's not nearly as grand a scale. 

"Hey," He greets lamely, and the mohawked boy's surprised at the gentle kindness (pity) in his tone. Somehow, Tavros isn't surprised by that. Hardly anything surprises him these days. "Do you need a ride back home?" He asks. 

Tavros considers it. The rain shows no signs of letting up and all he has is an attachable umbrella that would probably be of no use. Tavros took one glance at Sollux behind him, who just stood there, almost too quietly, and his mind was made up. 

"No." the boy answers, quick and blunt, and you could tell Karkat's surprised. He needed to be alone, not taking up Karkat's time with his partner. Taking in one final deep breath to calm the horrible apprehension beginning to up his insides, he begins to roll way to the storm outside, not before giving the pale raven a quick farewell and thank you. 

He was right, the umbrella didn't help much from the rain, but he didn't care. He just wants to go home. On the way, anxiety starts to eat him up. What's going to happen to him? Or to his home? He wasn't legal by Skaia standards, and Tavros didn't know if his father left a will. Questions and scenarios ruled his head with not even nearly enough answers to help him. Shivering from the cold air, the boy races home. It scares him to think that it might not be that way for long. 

Unlocking the front door, Tavros is slightly relieved to be out of the rain finally. About as relieved as a malfunctioning steambot. It didn't take him too long to wheel his way to his room, where he found Gamzee, sitting on his bed, worry filling the dim glow of his indigo eyes. The mohawked boy's breath hitched as the bot started to rise from his bed to meet him, holding out a copper arm to hold him with. 

Gamzee barely got off the bed before Tavros nearly crashed himself in his arms, crying for the first time in years


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy gets sick, and the bot plays medic, with the help of his tempermental friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, its been a year since I started posting this story. Well, over on FF anyway. Still a big deal. So here. Have some drama.

Tavros caught a cold.

At least that's what Gamzee says (go figure). The bot thinks he fell face first in an icy cold pond. It was honestly expected; if you feel like crap emotionally, your body will catch up sooner or later. To Tavros' bitter resentment, it chose sooner. The boy says it might be death coming to take him alongside his dad. The bot also says he's being a bit overdramatic. The boy says shut up and get him some water. The bot complies, but not without a small laugh or two and a kiss on the poor boy's head.

That's how it's been these past couple days. Stuck in bed with only an affectionate steambot and his own construed thoughts to keep him company. He's not complaining, about Gamzee anyway, but Tavros wishes he could get out of bed without the agonizing vertigo and the concentrated paranoia directed at his blankets when he falls back in with a weak grunt. Every second the boy spends in these deceptive covers is another moment he curses himself for rejecting Karkat's offer.

And Gamzee, bless his copper whatever he has. He's never left the boy's side once, tending to him like a high grade medic bot. From getting him fluids, to grabbing his normal meds, that he's never once questioned. Good bot, best taboo lover.

Furthermore, the mohawked boy hopes that he's left at least once, when he's in deep sleep, to at least take care of his birds, or himself, however that may be, but when Tavros wakes up, he's in the bot's arms, like always, as if he never left.

Tavros will never get used to the attention. It's almost alien.

Today, the boy woke up around noon. His head still aches, he's stiff as a board, and the blankets cocooning him offer no help from the waving chills cascading through his body. When he cranes his head to peer out of the sheets, he's surprised to find an empty space instead of a blithe clown bot. Surprised, the boy stretches further and finds a glass of water placed neatly on the end table. Still no steambot in sight. Tavros also notices the house quieter than usual, only the timid ticking of the clock on his dresser, slighting unnerving him. He meekly calls out the bot's name, only to be met with more silence.

He would probably be more alarmed if he didn't feel so ill.

A few minutes of silence later and he relaxes back into the sheets with a palpable groan. It's strangely foreign, being completely alone in the big empty house (it's not a home, not anymore, it doesn't feel like it). He's been alone before, back in his former home in Prospit, it happened more often than not, as well as the few times here before he met Gamzee, but he's grown accustomed to the beaming, painted grin of the friendly bot next to him. Tavros' mind starts to wonder however; where could he be? The boy doesn't think the clown would just leave without some sort of message at least.

Almost like a prayer answered, the sick boy hears the front door open, followed by a curt slam. Assuming it was Gamzee (who else would it be?), Tavros eases further into the bed, closing his eyes and hoping the bot would crawl back next to him and-

"He looks like shit."

Or Karkat could come in. Before the boy could question his presence, he feels the bed dip and metal fingers carding through his damp, russet Mohawk.

"Hush, bro. Motherfucker's all up and getting his snooze on."

Tavros doesn't really have the energy to move, so he lets the bot believe that. In moments he could hear loud footsteps throughout the room and a chair being pulled next to the bed. He then felt a rather cold hand roughly slap his forehead and Tavros fights the urge to make a face against it.

"He's fucking burning; pull down those gogdamned sheets. And move the hell away from him; you radiate heat like an airship engine. He'll overheat." Tavros didn't have to see Gamzee to know that he was confused about this sudden order, but he does it anyway, pulling down the blankets chest level, and even though he's reluctant to do so, Gamzee scoots to the edge of the bed anyway. Tavros tries not to show his discomfort, despite the renewed chills running down his body.

"He's gonna be fine, right?" The bot sounded too concerned for his own good, as if his surefire confidence a couple of days ago started wearing away.

"It's just a cold, Gamzee. Not the Rust Fever." Karkat pointed out, curtly. The chair creaked, and the mohawked boy heard a meager gruff. "Fucker shouldn't have ran off in the rain."

Stillness, then a shift on the automaton's side. "How's-"

"I don't want to fucking talk about it." Karkat cuts him off, and the boy could assume it was about Sollux. He felt the bot flinch slightly, and the older sighed. "Not now, okay?" He offered, and by the way the clown stills, he takes it.

It became silent for the next few minutes, only gears whirling, harsh breathing, and clock ticking. Tavros was well on his way back to sleep before he heard the shifting of papers from Karkat's side. "You know it's important when they send the shit in paper."

The sound of paper tearing. "Kar, ain't that motherfuckin' against the law, or whatever…?"

"Not like Terezi's going to burst through the window and choke me with her cane."

It took Tavros a few moments to realize that Karkat was going through his mail. The boy would be cross if he wasn't confined to a bed. And supposedly asleep.

More paper rustling. There is a loud snort before Karkat inquired, "Who the fuck is Jake English?"

The boy's ears perked at the mention of one of his only friends he still had left after his incident. He hadn't heard from Jake in a little while. Not since Tavros left for Skaia, anyway. The paraplegic thought he might have forgotten about him. He's a little bit happy that his childhood friend sent something, even if it's not the best time.

"A motherfuckin' friend of Tavbro. From that town he came from. Pros- something… I swear I motherfuckin' had it…" He explains with a disconcerted huff. A part of the boy is surprised that the bot remembers that small fact. Even if he couldn't get the city right.

"Prospit?" He almost sounds surprised. "Huh, I was born there." He states almost matter-of-factly as Tavros hears paper sliding on the end table and more ripping. Gamzee's hand started to massage the boy's waist, and he had to hold in a content coo.

There's more silence, and it starts to become unbearable, and the boy shifts slightly into the bot's hand. There is a loud sigh coming from no one other then Karkat, then the boy felt something land on his face.

"Kid's gonna get fucking evicted."

Tavros' eyes shot wide open, whatever illness plaguing his body almost gone in an instant, and he bolted upright on the bed, grabbing the document on his face and skimming through it. He thought he saw Gamzee jump, startled, while Karkat cursed roughly in the corner of the boy's eyes, but he ignored them in favor of the pressing matters in his hand. Reading the letter through and through, making sure not to miss a single word on the neat stationary, he starts panicking more and more.

He expected this. He really did. The day the boy came home from the memorial in the rain he knew his days were numbered in this borrowed house. He saved face though, pretended things were going to be okay, just enough to fool Gamzee. And it still hits hard. But what made the blow worse was the excuse; his disability. Because of the fact that Tavros is paralyzed mid-thigh down, he's deemed useless, a liability. A kid who couldn't take care of himself.

So throwing him in the streets is the perfect solution. They won't even put him in with a temporary family, because he is a month away from his 18th birthday.

"Shitheads." And for once, Karkat's right.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy is still sick, the bot is insecure, and the best friend teaches the bot how to cook.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahaha. *awkward laugh
> 
> Um, four months. Sorry. I had a major break up a few weeks after the last chapter and I just about lost my muse for this. I don't want to give this up though. I keep getting wayward reviews and kudos on here and a pbj blog on Tumblr reblogged all the chapters and well, I said fuck hiatus and shat this out. 
> 
> If its shitty, well, my ex was my editor. So yeah.

"Tavbro?"

"Hm?"

Tav's slowly petting the bot's unkempt hair, grunting in pain every few minutes. Poor Tavvy overdid himself, jumping from the bed so fast. Not that Gamzee blames him. Outside the room they can hear pots and pans clanking together, alongside the not-so- muffled frustrated curses of Karbro trying his motherfucking best to whip out some grub for the sick boy snuggled up right here (technically, he's not supposed to be in bed with him, but mother of all fucks Tavbro needs cuddles, even if best friends yells at him for it later).

"'M sorry." The clown tightens his hold around the boy, desperately clinging on to him like a anchor in a vast storm.

The boy's comforting movements stills and Gamzee dares to look up at him. The bot expected a different look that what Tav's giving. Instead of the disgust he's anticipating, he's given subtle confusion. His hand continues the movements and with a quiet, scratchy voice, he replies, "For what, Gamzee?" The boy's hand finds a small spot behind the bot's auditory ducts, and Gamzee almost motherfucking purrs on top of him.

 _You led him on,_ that fucking voice taunts you, disrupting your moment of bliss. _Led him to believe that his dad might be alive. You got his hopes up. LOOK AT HIM NOW. You don't deserve the way he says your name. OR THE WAY HE'S TOUCHING YOU RIGHT NOW._

Each ringing syllable from his think pan makes the bot cringe on the spot. They've been getting louder. If Tav notices, he doesn't say anything, just continues petting Gamzee affectionately, just how the steambot likes it.

_Now he's just as alone as YOU AR-_

"Gamzee, it's okay." Tavbro's hand doesn't leave the bot's hair, even when he nearly falls of the bed with a surprised 'hOnK'. "You, did nothing, wrong." The boy coos softly, slowly threading his free hand with yours. He's so warm, the clown realizes as he digs himself closer to the boy.

 _He's motherfucking LYING._ Gamzee's gears whirled almost painfully and he nuzzled into the crook of the boys neck. A small part of the bot wants to believe Tav, but the voices call out loud for him like a demented siren song. They've been gone for so long, why won't they leave him alone?

"I'm, glad you're, here, with me," he continues, and the bot could hear the soft smile in his hushed tone. "I don't know, what would happen, without you." Tav's fingers card through Gamzee's messy hair, pulling at the tangled curls held together by grease and other things unimaginable. "I'd be, alone, I guess…" He trails off, a bitter chuckle following.

For once Gamzee's think pan has nothing to say, and the copper clown buries himself in Tavbro's neck, a smile threatening to pull from his paint stained lips. The bot holds on to the chocolate boy harder than necessary, but Tav holds on just as tight, not wanting to let go for a time.

"GAMZEE! QUIT TRYING TO FUCK THE KID AND GET IN HERE AND HELP, YOU OVER GLORIFIED TIN BUCKET!"

And of course 'best friend' ruins the motherfucking moment. The order is followed by a loud curse that makes the bot cringe worse than the degrading voices.

With an awkward smile the steambot pulls away from the ill boy, but not before the boy pulls Gamzee back by his shirt and kisses him on his lips. The bots entire body heats up like the sun as the chocolate boy carefully glides his lips over the bots. With a coy grin Gamzee definitely feels against his own mirroring goofy smile, he pulls away from the too short contact. Instead of helping palebro like he asked, Gamzee spends the next few moments reveling in the fact that for the first time Tavros himself initiated a kiss. Feeling a little too giddy for his own good, the copper clown leans in for another one before Karbro makes his existence known again, like a motherfucker. By shouting once more.

"Go," Tav urges, "before he breaks something." His teasing tone is flawed by the scratchy affliction behind it. Reluctantly, Gamzee leave the bed, blowing a cheesy kiss to the boy before leaving the bedroom for the kitchen.

Of course the minute the bot enters the said room, Karbro's maliciously glaring at him with eyes that can wield battleaxes. Without tact, he points to the copper pot lined up perfectly on the top self, amidst several pots and pans scattered about haphazardly around and under it.

"Say one word, and I'll melt you into a walking stick for Sollux."

When he puts it that way… The bot passes the short raven with a throaty chuckle, reaching for the deceptive cookware with ease and placing it on the gas stove. Gamzee turns back to Kar and flourishes his wrist at the assembled wares. He couldn't finish his 'ta-dah!' before the raven pushes him aside and turns on the cooker. Without missing a beat, Karbro violently slaps pieces of uncooked meat on a wooden slab and shoves it in front of the bot.

"You wanna help your kid, chop this stuff up, and if I see a speck of oil on it I will boil you in this soup."

Then why let a clown bot cook? Oh well, Gamzee's learned a while ago not to ask these things.

\-----

The rest of the prep work was met in silence, (and Gamzee can proudly state that he did not land a bit of oil on the chicken, as Karkat calls it) only the sounds of the pot boiling and small curses from the pale kid echo through the empty kitchen. As the pot steadily shakes with boiling food, Karbro sighs, leaning over the sink with a contorted glare at nothing in particular. The day's are catching up to him, Gamzee can tell, but before the clown could inquire, the kid grunts out something so low, it almost passed right through Gamzee's auditory sensors.

"Sollux's getting evicted too." '

The bot should be more surprised than this, but somehow he knew this. Gamzee may be blissfully ignorant, but he's not completely stupid. "Sorry, bro." Was all he could really say, despite his think pan reveling different ways to cheer him up.

"It's… Okay, now, I guess. Dad wants to take them in, but Sollux's too fucking proud to take the help and," he breaks off with another aggressive sigh and runs his ranks his hand through his hair, "I… don't know. Sometimes I wonder if my fuckbrain of a brother is right; they we're just pawns of the hierarchy or whatever."

Gamzee doesn't give two shits about this so called 'hierarchy'. All he knows is that they are people more important than him and if he leaves them alone, it's all mIrAcLeS. The steambot stays uncharacteristically quiet, stirring the bubbling soup and only nodding when it seemed appropriate. The clown hears the sound of a head slamming against the counter and he turns to see palebro doing just that, repeatedly. The bot chuckles, earning a heated glare from Karbro.

His glare softens though, once the timer dings behind him and he realizes where he's at. He clicks it off before obtaining two bowls ("I'm hungry too, assface."), and pouring a hearty portion for the ill boy in the next room.

"You want him to stay with you, don't you." And that's why he's Gamzee's best friend. Karbro just knows. MiRaClEs is what that is.

"Yeah," the bot admits, shuffling from foot to foot, nervously. "Is that motherfuckin' okay, or something…?"

Karkat finishes filling the porcelain dinnerware, shoves a silver spoon in it, and hands it to the shifting bot. "I'll have to ask dad." He answers, brushing his warmed hands against his pants and turning back to the pot. "He's still not too entirely thrilled with you staying there for free." Gamzee shrugged, unabashed. While his heartgear drops at the answer, he sort of expected it. "Now get that to the kid." He waves the bot off, and with that he leaves for Tav's room with his trademarked smile.

Gamzee likes this; he likes helping out palebro and Tavvy. He likes playing nurse for Tavbro until he's all better. He likes cooking for him, even if he's not really doing anything and has to endure Karbro's malicious (but harmless, for the most part) threats in his general direction. Brother needs a chill pill. Whatever that is.

It's a sense of normalcy, is what he's trying to get at. Something that he's never quite experienced in the bot's long years of life. Feeding his birds is the closest he's gotten, but that's pure habit. It's hard, not going out to that nice place in front of that water thing, performing nice little tricks for all the lil' tikes, and his gears sometimes want to compulsively push him toward the door. But Tavbro rules them all out unanimously. And he's strangely okay with this.

The door creeks open and you find Tav propped on his bed, hunched over one of the letters he got today. By the ghost of a smile peaking behind his lips, Gamzee assumes it's the one from his friend elsewhere. He jerks his head upward, and he catches the bot's sight and the steaming food in his hands and that beautiful smile widens. His gears heating up with renewed vigor, the bot sets the food on the end table.

"You, made this?" The boy asks when he scoots over to the table. He peers over the bowl and the bot could hear an audible grumble from Tav's general direction. Gamzee laughs as he ineffectively pouts at you behind a heavy blush and grabs the spoon.

"Yep!" The bot chirps in response, taking his place on Tavbro's bed next to him.

"NO!" Came an intrusive shout from the outside. Gamzee winks and cups his lips at Tav, like he's sharing a deep, dirty secret.

"He motherfuckin' all up and had his bad self help this fine dish in it's quest for completion." The bot whispers, and the boy chuckles. It feels nice hearing that, his laugh, no matter how small, especially after everything that's happened.

The nice feelings continues even after the doorbell rang and Karbro shouts his disapproval, but announces that he'll get it. Their curiosity is peaked; the boy rising out of the bed and the bot turning toward the door.

"Horuss?"

Gamzee bolts, barely comprehending anything and anyone other than his mission to run behind a door that's not the front. He finds safety huddling inside the cramped walk-in closet, leaving Tavbro and his face of pure and utter confusion behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Horuss. It's too hard for me not to put in here. 8==D
> 
> I want to explain what a Checkpoint is (mentioned in Ch. 10). It's like a crossroads in the sky, basically put. I think of air travel like the game Jade Empire (if anyone's ever played that...). You need maps, a good ship, pilots, and if you veer from the path the wind'll knock you down a peg.
> 
> Or pirates. Pirates are also a bad thing to consider.
> 
> Um, here's some cookies for those emo corners y'all been occupying for a while. *toss


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy get's exciting news, and the bot still hides.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I have an excuse this time.
> 
> My last laptop started to turn on me. Everytime I would write something, the file would corrupt and eventually I just gave up. I tried writing on my phone (Two small drabble fics from SnK, haha), but that's not the same. But over New Years, a friend gave me his old laptop and now I'm back! Hail Smaug!
> 
> I'm also a bit rusty, so.

Tavros blinks, eyeing the closet Gamzee fled to in a rush. Few moments pass and his mouth opens, a question forming on the tip of his tongue before he shuts it, not quite knowing exactly what to say. After a few minutes of quiet contemplation, he finds his words again, but before he could utter a sound, the boy hears his bedroom door open, followed by a disgruntled Karkat and an unknown blonde man with a creepy smile, who's fidgeting with a pair of round brass goggles on his crown.

Tavros swallows.

"Hello," the man bellows, still smiling, reaching out his hand for the boy to shake. He takes it, timidly mumbling a 'hello' in reply, stiffly ignoring the pain shooting up his arm from the strong grip. The boys' eyes flicker to Karkat, who's mouthing a single question at Tavros ('Where is he?'). He responds by darting his eyes at the closet door. The raven sighs in relief, fully unnoticed by the man still towering over the mohawked boys' bed.

"My name is Horuss Zahhak," he begins, his hands fiddling with his black gloves, "I was a, uhm, friend of your father." At the mention of Tavros' deceased parent, the man's smile shrinks to something sadder, distant, and his cobalt eyes darken. By anyone else's wondering eyes, that expression can be mistaken as simply a friend mourning for another.

Not Tavros. He's a way too familiar to this look.

He's seen his father's old girlfriends give him that look back in Prospit, on his rare trips to get his medication when his dad can't be bothered. They would try and chat him up, hoping that by forging some form of bond with the object of their affections son, they can worm their way back to his father's heart. It doesn't work (a mix of Tavros' non-existent social skills and his dad's playboy attitude drives them away), but they can't help but try.

This time, it almost breaks the boys heart.

Horuss catches himself, wringing his wrists with a forced grin and with an awkward laugh, gestures to the chair on the other side of the bed. Karkat grumbles out an inaudible curse before trudging over and dragging the chair to the man, nearly slamming it down. Oblivious to Karkat's obtrusive behavior (or rather ignoring), the man sits, bringing the attention once again to the squirming Tavros.

"Now then," he shifts in the chair, taking in a deep breath before continuing, "I don't know if you can guess why I'm here… Or if your father has ever told you about me… But nonetheless, I'm here on his request, in the event of his untimely… passing." His words are forced, like he's in disbelief. Tavros doesn't blame him. But he wishes the man would stop mentioning it. The wound hardly crusted over.

"I'm, sorry…?" Tavros offers, one part questioning his motives and one part condolences, trying and succeeding in holding in his stutter. He can almost see Gamzee's congratulatory smile from behind the door. Horuss smiles, nodding in thanks before resuming.

"Yes, well, he asked me for a favor. One that will have a large impact on your life, if you choose to accept naturally." He nods again, accompanied by a large smile that almost puts Gamzee's to shame.

(It's not the same though, he reminds himself. Not even close.)

Karkat chooses now to butt in with his colorful lexicon. "Mind getting to the point, Horuss? The kid's sick, and I'm pretty sure you don't want his peasant germs." The last two words drip out of his mouth like acid. Tavros shivers. Horuss nods, but the creepy smile doesn't leave his face.

"Of course, my apologies." He plays with the hem of his gloves again before addressing the boy. "My brother and I are both engineers. Most days we work with the Empresses army, building her soldier steambots, working on the airships, that sort of work. However, as of late Equius, my brother, and I both have taken to a pet project of ours." He pauses, for what you assume for dramatic effect. "It's still in its experimental phase, and we've only got few results due to limited testing, but all of them came out exceptional, and your father wanted you participate, so to speak."

Karkat groans and Tavros lets out a very intelligent 'uh…' in the face of the man's word vomit. He half expects Gamzee to laugh, and the cycle would complete itself.

"Um, what, is this project..?" The boy asks, almost dreading the answer he'll get. He could swear the strangers eyes sparked with pride before answering.

"Engineering prosthetics."

Tavros blinks. Then his heart nearly stops. Karkat's eyes widen in surprise. And the boy could swear he saw an enlarged indigo optic peeking through the closet door. Horuss' composure remains unchanged, but he could see an aura of smugness radiate from the man.

"Rufioh wanted you to live life at the fullest," he says, and the boys heart clenches at the mention of his dad's name, "without the hindrance of that." He ruefully points at the wheelchair stationed on the other side of the bed.

Tavros' first reaction is to assume that he's joking. Because really. Who would want to help him? Even if it is a favor from a man that Horuss is still infatuated with. Then he just sort of becomes… Hopeful? The thought of never having to use the chair again is appealing.

Okay, more than appealing. It's gogdamn exciting. The boy is tempted to punch the air in glee.

Horuss then explains to him the situation. The legs are made from a mixture of steel and copper, the same alloy mixture used for the army steambots. His legs will have to amputated beforehand (Tavros pales visibly at the note), but he will have feeling in them. Not enough to cause him pain or such, just enough to control to the limbs. The legs will attach to the mid thigh (where he still has minimal feeling) with some extra casting reaching the top. The legs are detachable, for hygiene and such, but in doing so would cause pain ("Detaching your nerves from the nerve sensors in the legs," he explains, "You'll get used to it.").He would have to go to a therapist to relearn how to walk and would have to appoint an engineer for regular tune ups. As the explanations continue, Tavros starts to feel a little overwhelmed and Karkat asks if he could hurry up.

"Now," he finishes, complying with the scowling raven. He pats the bedding next to you in an almost nurturing way. "I don't expect an answer right away. I'll send more information later via messenger later and you can take your time in getting back to me. This is still a lot to take in." He rises from the chair, brushing off invisible dust off his leather engineer coat. "I must be off. My brother might have destroyed the lab. I'll see myself out." And with a curt nod and perfect form he walks away, only stopping to regard Karkat.

"Karkat, if you see Gamzee anywhere-"

"Bite me." He retaliates quick enough to induce whiplash.

Horuss sighs, but doesn't say anymore, and just like that he departs, leaving the bed ridden boy to his (chaotic whirlwind of) thoughts.

He's getting legs. He's getting a pair of prosthetic legs that move. He's going to walk again.

Before he could make any word of pure joy the closet door busts open and a black and copper blur darts to the bed and attacks Tavros with kisses to his jaw and face. The boy giggles and Karkat scoffs before occupying the seat once taken by Horuss.

"What is it with the fucking nobles getting it on with peasants? First my aggravating brother and that fucking greased up duke dick and now your dad and that." He jolts his thumb at the door, scowling with the intensity of the entire royal army.

"Dun all up and forget your lova and the Heiress, once upon a motherfuckin' time." Gamzee quips, pausing momentarily in his assault.

"Thank you, Gamzee, for reminding me of that. Really." He is not thankful.

Shifting the bot to a better position next to him, Tavros kisses the tip of Gamzee's paint covered nose. The bot mewls in approval and nuzzles the boys' side. Karkat gags, louder than necessary. Gamzee thought he was going to actually vomit.

\------

"Gamzee, why did you, dash when Horuss came?" It is a legitimist question, one that could have been asked at a better time, but the boy couldn't help himself. Despite his giddiness over the idea of walking again, the sight of the clown fleeing to his closet over a strange engineer is rather disconcerting.

Karkat, holding a bowl of soup to his lips, pauses mid sip to let out a nondescript hum. Gamzee looks up from his spot on the neck and shrugs.

"Really, kid? That's going to be the topic of choice?" Karkat purses his lips as he sets the empty bowl on the end table.

"My, eh, former caretaker. Before Dirk-bro. Motherfuckers ain't bad for a quick check up. But…" Gamzee stops, rubbing the back of his neck. "The fuckers are touchy. Really motherfuckin' touchy. Like they'd grab and prod and do all kinds o' shit I ain't all too fond of." The bot grins sheepishly.

"Doesn't that sound familiar." The raven bites. Gamzee shoots him a half-hearted glare.

"It's alright now; Dirk-bro don't pull that shit on me." The bot finishes lamely, half-shrugging nonchalantly.

"They are obsessed with him, is what he means. He'd come back more fucking twitchy than normal and he'd mess up during those shows of his." Gamzee frowns, but doesn't correct him.

The boy imagines the bot strapped to a workbench. He sees a pair of hands dragging across his copper form. He sees tools and parts of the like, discarded and unused. He hears Gamzee asking, pleading, them to stop. They don't .

Tavros pales, gripping the hand of his steambot. Something heated coils down in the pit of his stomach, nearly making him sick. He squeezes harder, possessively. He starts to see red. The clown blinks, pulling at the boy's clenched grip.

"Tavbro?"

The boy flinches, tugging unconsciously at the bots' hand. Looking up he sees Gamzee's glowing orbs peering inquisitively. Next to him, Karkat remains neutral, but his attention rests at Tavros. "Tav? You okay?" He cocks his head to the side.

He swallows, not feeling the slightest better. Heat rising to his cheeks, the boy sinks into the sheets, hoping that they might eat him whole. Gamzee goes down with him, and pokes his heated nose, grinning twofold. "So, how do ya feel 'bout gettin' new legs, Tavvy?" The copper clown quirks, way too eager to change the subject.

Tavros blinks. He had nearly forgotten all about that. The most important moment perhaps in his life (aside from meeting Gamzee, his mind adds), and it's pushed aside just like that. Somehow, it doesn't alarm him as much as it should.

"Does it bother you?" He suddenly asks. "That it's, um, him? Them? Giving me legs?"

Karkat's face twitches to something more concern-like before returning back to its neutral semi-scowling state. Gamzee nearly leaps from the confines of Tavros' sheets before taking both his hands and roughly cupping the boy's face.

"No no no no no, motherfuck no-" he chants, shaking his head in time with the words, almost desperately "do not let me be the reason that you give up a chance to motherfuckin' walk again. Please please please." He emphasizes each word with a vigorous shake of his head and his hands start to squeeze tight around his face.

"But-"

"No."

Karkat, who's been uncharacteristically quiet the whole time, pulls Gamzee's hands away from the boy's head and smacks the bot on the forehead. "Calm the fuck down."

"But he's-"

"Aren't you afraid that they might do the same to him?" Karkat blurts harshly, and in that moment, it feels like time stopped. Tavros wasn't even thinking of that, and by the way Gamzee's eyes flicker between anger and confusion, neither did he.

Then the bot's body screamed.

"I won't MOTHERFUCKING let them."

Karkat slaps him again, making the clown lurch backward.

"I'll go with him. Jegus, Gamzee." The raven announces. Said bot gives him a peculiar glare.

"You're motherfucking squeamish." He points out.

"Then someone will come with me. That way if I pass out in my own vomit, they can fight them long enough in case they do something and you can go in and rescue the kid." He shrugs, like it's the most common thing in the world.

Gamzee stares for a few silent moments before giving the man a fond grin, his eyes glowing back to its normal shade of indigo . "You've been all up and readin' that motherfuckin' romance stuff. Haven't ya, Karbro?"

"Shut up."

Tavros has never felt more out of the loop in his life. But he ends up chuckling alongside Gamzee anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I almost turned Tavros into Sherlock for a moment. Another time perhaps.


End file.
